Make a wish family files complaint

[Pooh2]

I feel sorry for this women's children. If she behaves in this manner at the end of a trip gifted to her family, I do not imagine she is any picnic to be around during regular routine life at home..

 

[SueM in MN]

That's what I thought too. I'm surprised that they qualified for MAW. The kids I know who have been granted wishes have had terminal or very life shortening diseases.

The spending of $191 also makes me feel like she was planning all along to extend the shopping trip out long enough to see that parade at night too.

I feel bad for the child though to have to deal with Mom's poor behavior--I hope he had the magical trip she didn't.

MAW is for life threatening conditions.
Just what that means in each situation may be different.

MAW is for life-threatening diseases not just terminal. However, I'm kind of surprised that Hemophillia qualified for the trip. My dd9 has a rare bleeding disorder under the hemophilia "umbrella" similar to VonWillebrand but she does not qualify.

Hemophilia A is one of the more severe forms under the umbrella of hemophilia. People with severe forms of hemophilia A might only have 1% of the clotting ability in their blood that the average person has.
I would assume the child does have a severe form if he has a port for giving medication - those are used for people who have frequent need for access.

It sounds to me like the mother was being very difficult, but if the manager of the store said " YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE of your sons wish" to her, in my opinion, that was completely inappropriate. It certainly did nothing to defuse the situation.

That is what the mother says, but that very well may not have been what was said at all.
Even if the CM used the words "take advantage" it may have been in a different sentence entirely - for example 'I'm sorry that your child is on a MAW trip, but guests who have not paid for the party are not allowed to take advantage of the extra hours'
The mom may have heard only "MAW take advantage"

And, we don't know what happened. The mom herself wrote that she refused to leave the store. Did she request a manager or demand a manager?
Did she ask to be allowed to stay and shop, or did she demand it?

 

[M5ward]

We were at MNSSHP on that night. It was more crowded than any other party we have attended. I can't imagine standing in that crush of people on what was a pretty hot and muggy night with a medically fragile child crying for an hour just to buy a few toys.
It doesn't sound like the child's well-being was the first priority at that moment.

 

[ttintagel]

I can't believe Security didn't do their jobs and escort them from the park. That just sends the message to other people that all they have to do is throw a tantrum and they'll get whatever they want, too.

 

[disney david]

I can't believe Security didn't do their jobs and escort them from the park. That just sends the message to other people that all they have to do is throw a tantrum and they'll get whatever they want, too.

To be fair we don't know if they was called if they was they would have no choice but to escort them out. It not security call to have them go in and shop it be other managers so maybe one manager told her she was calling security and talked it over with a higher up and they decide to let her shop and not have security arrive. Disney security most of the time dose not play around they could if arrived and a security manager along with other managers felt that it he better to let them shop then try and get them to leave on their own. Because the last thing Disney security and Disney needs is the bad publicity of throwing out a make a wish family.

We have to give Disney security some lee way In this situation due to it being a make a wish family. And not knowing the full details because their a lot of holes in the story and she did change some of if from the article to her face book post.

 

[sookie]

He has hemophilia. Poor little dude - he is cute.

I think it is great that MAW kids get to go and have a great time at Disney. If your 5 - and a MAW kid - your pretty much going to Disney!

However, that being said - many of these kids are not on deaths door when they walk into the gates of WDW. There are some though that look it - I saw one that was a pale little thing in her wheelchair at WDW, very thin and white, wearing a mask and blankets in October - she looked exhausted too. I'm pretty sure she was a wish kid. I felt like I wanted to just take her back to her room for a nap - her family was pushing her around at all times of the morning and night. But maybe that was what she wanted.

Anyway, you can qualify for a MAW trip by having any life altering condition or, at least at one time, a condition that was life threatening for you (a chronic disease, even if well controlled - something like hemophilia).

I think that mom is blowing this one over the top - I don't think that being a MAW kid entitles you to everything mom wishes or desires during your trip if you didn't plan for it. I mean, honestly - they couldn't spring for the party tickets after having their vacation paid for like that? Or at least asked MAW in advance for party tickets, just by doing a little planning? I bet they would have made it happen.

Even the little cancer kiddos have to be well enough to tolerate the trip (usually). It is not only for kids who are on hospice or anything else. Just - life threatening illness. So they could be recovering, have a good prognosis and doing well at that time, but still be eligible for MAW. We all just hear MAW and immediately drop because they are kids and sick. But still - the adults have to have some boundaries (and personal responsibility).

http://wish.org/about-us/making-a-difference/granting-wishes

 

[sookie]

MAW is for life-threatening diseases not just terminal. However, I'm kind of surprised that Hemophillia qualified for the trip. My dd9 has a rare bleeding disorder under the hemophilia "umbrella" similar to VonWillebrand but she does not qualify.

Honestly you would probably qualify, and can self refer (if your under 18).

Ask for something good - like the top room available at the poly or something!

 

[franluvsbubba]

From reading the article, it really felt like this Mom was using her son to get beyond preferential treatment. I know Make A Wish kids are treated like royalty at Disney (and they should be) but using your wish kid to do something a cast member has told you that you cannot do? It feels kind of gross to me.

Me too. Not to mention, was it really that big a deal as to what she said. Maybe that was her conscience bothering her, which is why she made such a big deal about it. Thankfully, I don't have an ill child like that, so I can't fully experience what she goes through daily, but like a PP said, she was on a free trip to WDW, and sick kid or no, rules are rules.

 

[kaytieeldr]

I mean, honestly - they couldn't spring for the party tickets after having their vacation paid for like that? Or at least asked MAW in advance for party tickets, just by doing a little planning? I bet they would have made it happen.

Ah, but they did, no? Doesn't the article mention Peyton celebrating Halloween with Mickey? This just wasn't "that" night. It was their last night, and she wanted what she wanted by golly and she was going to get what she wanted where she wanted darn it and no silly rules apply to her.

 

[kellyw8863]

I think it's important to keep in mind that the whole Make A Wish thing is incredibly difficult for those of us who go through it, and that we can't account for this mother's emotional state by the end of the trip. On the surface, it seems like we as parents of wish kids should be overjoyed that our children are chosen for wishes and we are - it's a truly awesome experience. But it's really much more complex than that, especially when your child is one who lives daily with a life-threatening, life-limiting condition. Once you get past the, "Oh my gosh, we're going to Disney," you're left with, "Oh my gosh,I can't believe my kid is sick enough to qualify because Make A Wish is only for the REALLY sick kids". And then there's a lot of pressure for the trip to be perfect, and the fear that it won't be perfect, and the idea that you'll never get to do this again for as long as the child may live. The article says this was on their last night. The last night before their lives are going back to the way they have always been - the needle sticks, the fear, the hospitalizations. Don't you think that perhaps emotions were running high? Maybe they hadn't had a great week health wise? Maybe mom knew that things were trending south and they were about to get a huge smack from reality, that she wanted one last chance to do this for her kids? We don't know. All we know is what we see on the surface, that there was an apparently unbalanced mom who just wanted more after she had already been given so much. We don't even know that this is who she really is. You spend all week as a Wish family being told if you want something, ask for it. Don't be afraid to tell people you're on a Wish trip to see if you can get some special consideration. We're told that. We're told that the Wish is for the child but the experience is for the family. It's a complex thing, one that you can't fully understand until you've lived it. In many ways, when we went back as a family this past April, the trip was so much better there were no expectations that it would be the trip of a lifetime. There was no pressure for it to be perfect. We could simply be together as a family. Again, something that's hard to understand unless you've lived it.

 

[mom2rtk]

I think it's important to keep in mind that the whole Make A Wish thing is incredibly difficult for those of us who go through it, and that we can't account for this mother's emotional state by the end of the trip. On the surface, it seems like we as parents of wish kids should be overjoyed that our children are chosen for wishes and we are - it's a truly awesome experience. But it's really much more complex than that, especially when your child is one who lives daily with a life-threatening, life-limiting condition. Once you get past the, "Oh my gosh, we're going to Disney," you're left with, "Oh my gosh,I can't believe my kid is sick enough to qualify because Make A Wish is only for the REALLY sick kids". And then there's a lot of pressure for the trip to be perfect, and the fear that it won't be perfect, and the idea that you'll never get to do this again for as long as the child may live. The article says this was on their last night. The last night before their lives are going back to the way they have always been - the needle sticks, the fear, the hospitalizations. Don't you think that perhaps emotions were running high? Maybe they hadn't had a great week health wise? Maybe mom knew that things were trending south and they were about to get a huge smack from reality, that she wanted one last chance to do this for her kids? We don't know. All we know is what we see on the surface, that there was an apparently unbalanced mom who just wanted more after she had already been given so much. We don't even know that this is who she really is. You spend all week as a Wish family being told if you want something, ask for it. Don't be afraid to tell people you're on a Wish trip to see if you can get some special consideration. We're told that. We're told that the Wish is for the child but the experience is for the family. It's a complex thing, one that you can't fully understand until you've lived it. In many ways, when we went back as a family this past April, the trip was so much better there were no expectations that it would be the trip of a lifetime. There was no pressure for it to be perfect. We could simply be together as a family. Again, something that's hard to understand unless you've lived it.

I actually sort of wondered if it being their last night might have contributed to the mom not being very rational.

But honestly, if that's all it was, she should have been able to step back and rethink once she was out of the moment. It appears that instead she went home and contacted the local media. That's where my sympathy is just done.

 

[Coonhound]

That is what the mother says, but that very well may not have been what was said at all.
Even if the CM used the words "take advantage" it may have been in a different sentence entirely - for example 'I'm sorry that your child is on a MAW trip, but guests who have not paid for the party are not allowed to take advantage of the extra hours'
The mom may have heard only "MAW take advantage"

My thoughts exactly! I doubt the CM actually used the words the same way the mom thought. Maybe same words rearranged or with a different meaning.

 

[pampam]

I agree with pretty much everything everyone has posted, but especially what kellyw8863 said. As I am reading this I am crying, remembering what was to be DD's last trip, and I have to say, the stress was unbearable. I was always able to control myself through whatever upset I had, but it truly was hard. I was trying to pack a lifetime of memories into one vacation, yet mourning her death even before it happened. Untill you have done something similar, I don't belive most of you can comprehend the emotions and feelings a parent experiences. Now, I'm not saying the mother was in the right, because clearly she reacted different from what all of us here agree on. But in my heart I cut her a break, because I'm sure it was a misunderstanding gone horribly wrong. She has my best wishes as I share fellow feelings with her. I have no idea what her little boy's prognosis is, but I'm sure even as time passes, this could be a painful memory for the family with lots of regrets.

 

[kellyw8863]

I'm still not comfortable judging. Again, we don't know what she came home to. We don't know what her expectations were for the trip, and we don't know the extent to which they were met. I've received more than one private message from Wish families who read my TR and went down there thinking the week was going to be equally amazing and instead, they came home disappointed, if not downright depressed. I understand that we were one of the lucky ones. We had some truly unbelievable experiences that we didn't go looking for. But if you had asked my husband if he would ever go back, he would've told you no, that it was not a vacation to him, that it was too stressful. And that's considering we had a great week! So I'm still willing to give the family a pass unless it comes out that this is a long standing pattern of behavior. And I'll be forever grateful that I dealt with my emotions that week by crying - big fat I don't want anyone to see me ugly cries - instead of lashing out and asking for things that weren't meant to be. I can't imagine how much more difficult that would have made my assimilation back into life as I knew it.

 

[Schmeck]

You spend all week as a Wish family being told if you want something, ask for it. Don't be afraid to tell people you're on a Wish trip to see if you can get some special consideration. We're told that. We're told that the Wish is for the child but the experience is for the family. It's a complex thing, one that you can't fully understand until you've lived it. In many ways, when we went back as a family this past April, the trip was so much better there were no expectations that it would be the trip of a lifetime. There was no pressure for it to be perfect. We could simply be together as a family. Again, something that's hard to understand unless you've lived it.

Who tells you this info? Disney, or GKTW, or the Wish Foundation?

 

[kellyw8863]

GKTW and MAW.

 

[kellyw8863]

When volunteering at GKTW, we were told not to tell a family no, that if you didn't know how to make something happen for a family, call one if the supervisors. It didn't matter if the request came from the Wish child, a parent, or a sibling. They bent over backwards to meet family requests - obviously within reason.

When we were there as a Wish family, I distinctly remember one of the families asking during orientation if there was anyone to help with dining reservations because they had traveled on very short notice. We were all told that if we wanted something, we should mention that we were on a Wish trip in case anything could be done.

 

[Gracie09]

I think there is a difference between getting a last inure dining reservation and trying to stay in the park after it was closed to day guests. Having been to the park on a party night there are many announcements that then park is closing to day guests. It's not a big secret. I'm sure an exception would be made if the child needed to use the bathroom or first aid but shopping, really. Like others have said we don't actually know what the cm said only what the mother said she said. It is possible they offered shopping alternative but the mother was so focused on this is where I want to shop and I'm going to do it.

 

[kellyw8863]

I think there is a difference between getting a last inure dining reservation and trying to stay in the park after it was closed to day guests. Having been to the park on a party night there are many announcements that then park is closing to day guests. It's not a big secret. I'm sure an exception would be made if the child needed to use the bathroom or first aid but shopping, really. Like others have said we don't actually know what the cm said only what the mother said she said. It is possible they offered shopping alternative but the mother was so focused on this is where I want to shop and I'm going to do it.

And we don't know this woman's situation or mental state or anything. The point I was trying to make is that going on a Make a Wish trip is more complex than it would seem on the surface.

 

[mom2rtk]

She asked for something. And she was told no. She needed to move on. And not contact the media.

I would expect now to go look up "ungrateful" in the dictionary and find her picture.