A Grand Tour of The Entire Midwest, But Mostly Wisconsin (UPDATE 11/12--BONUS Texas TR NOW COMPLETE)

[Captain_Oblivious]

I'm seldom satisfied.

Case in point.... I'm still reading...

Glutton for punishment, I guess.

She bought an entire town.
Then went bankrupt.

Ah. That sounds vaguely familiar.

Seems like a solid business plan.

Then again.... Some companies (like Rolex) rely more on a few customers paying extremely high prices.

True. I guess that was the plan here. They must have overestimated the number of extremely rich people willing to travel hours to the middle of nowhere.

Of course not!
Counting with base ten is easy. It gets harder when you use base eleven.

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!

Great! I've got one vote!

Actually, I'm making it sound like Westworld.

Interesting.
My current TR, I've posted room photos and.... wondered why?

Hey, look! Two beds and a bathroom!

I'd be okay with that.

Canoeing can be a lot of fun. As long as you're not constantly going upwind.

I wondered about that.
But still, uphill? That's a bit of a hike.

Yeah, the climb was no joke.

Sure. Makes total sense.

One key difference: there's no water in the Rio Grande.

As long as you don't tickle me back.

Well, that escalated quickly.

You know who is?
everyone else.

I'd like to amend my statement. I would TOTALLY pay to see that!

Mine is the one that's a touch smaller.

Gotcha. Now I learned something today!

Awww... pillow included?

No, she's not endlessly nice.

Must get down there some day.

If only for the BBQ. And Big Bend.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Looks really nice! I'm impressed!

It really is a nice resort! Just hard to get to.

Well that sure worked out nicely!

.... or not.

Story of my life.

Well hey, you can't have everything!

...unless you're Captain Oblivious.

Everything AND a needle in the behind.

You know, if that helicopter was exploding, it'd be a much better TR.

I'm kicking myself for a missed opportunity there.

Very nice setting for a dinner!

It was! Lovely out there.

Well dang! (Not that I"m ever going to get to Texas anytime soon, but...)

It's pretty fun to do a BBQ Trail through Texas.

Totally missed that until Liesa pointed it out...

Doesn't it sound better that way?

 

[pkondz]

Glutton for punishment, I guess.

Obviously masochistic tendencies.

Hey, look! Two beds and a bathroom!

Yup.
Guess what you're gonna see on my next update?

Canoeing can be a lot of fun. As long as you're not constantly going upwind.

Or upstream.

One key difference: there's no water in the Rio Grande.

Good news, we're going rafting!
Yay!
Bad news, we can't use a raft.
Boo!
Good news, we can use canoes!
Yay!
Bad news, you have to carry them.
Boo!

I'd like to amend my statement. I would TOTALLY pay to see that!

 

[franandaj]

They’ll Never Think To Look For Us Here.

Who? How did you get yourselves into that kind of trouble so quickly?

A place to lie low and avoid whatever desperadoes might be out there. A hideout, if you will.

I like the idea of a hideout!

Formerly known as The Hideout at Lajitas (which is a much, much cooler name),

Definitely a much cooler name, no wonder business is down.

Another developer bought the resort in 2007 and started slashing prices to try and attract more guests.


Did it work? I have no idea. I mean, the resort is still there. It consists of several sections of gorgeously-appointed hotel rooms, a nice sit-down restaurant, and a world-class golf course. But during the 2 nights we were there, I could have counted the number of other guests I saw on one hand.

Nice for you as a guest, but doesn't bode well for the management.

Sarah, being our resident daredevil, considered the question for approximately 1.71 milliseconds before she leaped at the chance to do a zip line.

She is far more daring than I.

Eventually we reached the edge of the park border, and that’s when the trail changed. We were heading up to the top of this:

I'll meet you back in the room.

The resort is in the left-center of the photo, and you can see some of the golf course as well.

I'd be thinking, "who's going to be carrying me back?"

We met up with everyone else and traded stories about our morning adventures over a gourmet lunch of baked leavened dough garnished with nut and berry spreads.

Nice....Oh wait?

Then the four of us got saddled up for a private ride through the Big Bend wilderness. It wasn’t private because we’d paid extra for the experience. It was private because no one else was stupid enough to ride during the hottest part of the day.

Who would do that?




Oh.

Then, as we rested to enjoy the view and some water, he kept creeping over towards this cliff. I can only assume he was thinking of seeing how long it would take me to hit the bottom.

Sucka...

Another random observation: ever heard the phrase, "I have to pee like a racehorse."? Well, that phrase exists for a reason. These horses must have bladders the size of an inflatable kiddie pool.

I have witnessed this phenomenon....Pretty crazy.

Everything was delicious, except for the refried beans, because refried beans are uniformly nasty (no matter how good they are for your heart).

I know you're going to be shocked, but I like refried beans, not as the sole component of the meal, but certainly in addition to a taco, enchilada or fajitas. No burrito would be complete without refried beans!

And drove. And drove. In case I hadn’t mentioned it before, Texas is big

One can experience a similar phenomenon in California. Although I believe that the scenery may be a bit more interesting.

Somehow, we all made it out of there without sequined shirts.

Now a photo of you all in sequined cowboy shirts would have made quite the Christmas card!

I could never resist the siren call of Texas beef brisket any more than I could resist a Dole Whip float on a hot summer day.

I've never been much of a brisket person, more of a ribs kind of girl.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Those modern appendages have been known to reduce folk’s reaction times a mite.

As long as she doesn't do it while driving. Reaction time is important there.

God spends a great deal of time laughing.
Must be hard for him to catch a breath.

I figure he looks at us like a regular sitcom act.

Along with a hand full of others, but that one most.

Calvin was always my favorite. I'd always save that one for last when reading the comics in the newspaper.

It finally got here yesterday.
They’re predicting that it should last for at least another seventeen hours or so.

Sounds about right. We usually go straight from the 80's to the low 50's, no stops in between.

Budgetary concerns go right along with character-building. They work hand-in-hand.

My favorites were always the snowmen Calvin built. Those were some all-timers.

I figured it was the boarder patrol…

Wait…
It is a black chopper.
Could you hear it off in the distance or was it one of those silent black choppers?
There’re everywhere man!

You know, i can't really remember. Now I'm scared!

My advice to you is to start drinking heavily…

Our young’en just headed back to school.
It still scares his Momma to death.

All you can do is teach him well and hope for the best.

Hopefully, the rest of the meal made up for that unmitigated effrontery.

It was wonderful, especially not having to eat any green stuff.

Talk about a bad investment...

Definitely mis-identified his market.

This is a theme that Disney could do very well!

They could do it in their sleep!

You win!

Zip line FTW!

Wow... like the Eagles grasping defeat from the jaws of victory, huh?

Let's see...
Initial excitement (check)
Promise of incredible joy (check)
Soul-crushing disappointment at the last minute (check)

Yep, it's exactly like an Eagles game. Hey, how are the Colts doing?

Is that the point where you kick him in the knee and remind him you only have to outrun the slowest one?

He's faster than me, by the way.

Finally! That sounds way better than those crappy PB&J sandwiches you usually eat.

Exactly! It was time to give them something a little more upscale.

You speak the truth.

Well, we're idiots.

I'm kind of surprised they didn't have fresh horses to take back out, but then again, I think you said it was an hour ride. They can handle it better than the whiny, hot human on their back.

I know horses are tough animals. I felt badly for them, though. Anyway, I figured Duncan had a reason for wanting to throw me off the cliff.

I notice everybody is wearing a helmet, except for you. I guess that says something about what is or isn't worth being protected...

The guides didn't have helmets either, smart guy. Obviously it just reflects our skill level.

It definitely looks like a beautiful place! However they stay in business, hopefully it continues to work!

I would definitely go back! I'd love to try out the golf course.

Oh yeah, when she wants something...

Funny how that works, isn't it? Meanwhile, I got a t-shirt.

So you brought the quality of the place down a notch or 2?

We tend to have that effect.

Sounds like a great meal!!

It's BBQ. What's not to like?

 

[GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes]

As long as she doesn't do it while driving. Reaction time is important there.

Especially as she'll need to be able to react to all the other drivers that are using their phones.

Or just as bad, fiddling with all interactive foolishness that the manufacturer are installing on their cars now-a-days.

I figure he looks at us like a regular sitcom act.

I always figured it was more that he spent a lot of time doing a face-palm.

It was wonderful, especially not having to eat any green stuff.

It's just garnish...
push it aside.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

The princess bride

Excellent choice.

Lord of the rings.

I read those once way back when I was a kid. Or, more accurately, my mom read them to me.

Germany. Dream to drive fast on autobahn and also see countryside and castles.

I like it! Bucket list for sure.

Banana sliced in the peel and falls all over when person tries to peel/eat normally.

Simple, yet effective.

Ferrari

Not sure. 3 of the 4 states I've not been to are near you (Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont). Only other 1 is Hawaii.

Hmm..."near" me?

Nope

Thank goodness. I'll still have 4 readers or so.

I haven't see all of your travels, so if you've not seen Bryce/Zion or the grand canyon, those three. Closer to your home, skyline drive and Luray Caverns.

Nailed all of them! In my signature, the "Dry Heat Expedition" chronicles our trip to the Southwest. We did the majority of Skyline Drive and Luray Caverns several years ago when I got tickets to a practice round at the Masters.

The bubble...I can forget about the cares of the world for a bit and just immerse myself in Disney.

Makes perfect sense to me.

Do I have to?

Considering I have no authority whatsoever, anything I suggest is more like Pirate Code.

Obviously masochistic tendencies.

Obviously.

This one goes to 11!

Yup.
Guess what you're gonna see on my next update?

Yay. I can hardly wait.

Or upstream.

That, too.

Good news, we're going rafting!
Yay!
Bad news, we can't use a raft.
Boo!
Good news, we can use canoes!
Yay!
Bad news, you have to carry them.
Boo!

This almost sounds like an Abbott & Costello routine.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Who? How did you get yourselves into that kind of trouble so quickly?

Now I know you've read about me and my family before. That shouldn't be surprising.

I like the idea of a hideout!

We all need one sometimes!

Definitely a much cooler name, no wonder business is down.

Should have slashed the prices but kept the name.

Nice for you as a guest, but doesn't bode well for the management.

Hopefully they have some high seasons that bring in guests. It's so hard to get there, though.

She is far more daring than I.

I've always thought a zip line would be really fun!

I'll meet you back in the room.

I confess, I had similar thoughts.

I'd be thinking, "who's going to be carrying me back?"

Where's that helicopter?

Nice....Oh wait?

Who would do that?




Oh.

Only a moron!

Sucka...

That's me...

I have witnessed this phenomenon....Pretty crazy.

It's no joke.

I know you're going to be shocked, but I like refried beans, not as the sole component of the meal, but certainly in addition to a taco, enchilada or fajitas. No burrito would be complete without refried beans!

Shocked, I tell you! Shocked!

All of those variations of meat and cheese wrapped in a tortilla are perfectly good without adding anything with both the consistency and smell of poo.

One can experience a similar phenomenon in California. Although I believe that the scenery may be a bit more interesting.

I have to agree there, although I remember that once you clear the mountains, the desert is...not exciting.

Now a photo of you all in sequined cowboy shirts would have made quite the Christmas card!

I can't allow something like that to exist!

I've never been much of a brisket person, more of a ribs kind of girl.

The ribs have to be exactly right so they fall off the bone for me. Otherwise, it's a lot of work and a lot of mess for a comparatively small amount of meat. Brisket is hard to get right, but when it is...it's amazing!

Especially as she'll need to be able to react to all the other drivers that are using their phones.

Or just as bad, fiddling with all interactive foolishness that the manufacturer are installing on their cars now-a-days.

Hey, look! Something shiny!

I always figured it was more that he spent a lot of time doing a face-palm.

It could run 50/50.

It's just garnish...
push it aside.

Being doing that for over 40 years!

 

[docsoliday1]

Hmm..."near" me?

Well, much nearer to you than to me. I consider Deleware to be one of the New England states, so, sorry, but I consider most of the small states (Maine doesn't count) to be relatively near each other (MD, DE, NJ, RI, MA, NH, CT, VT).

It's about twice as far from GA to DE as from DE to NH or VT, so, yes I consider them near to you.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Well, much nearer to you than to me. I consider Deleware to be one of the New England states, so, sorry, but I consider most of the small states (Maine doesn't count) to be relatively near each other (MD, DE, NJ, RI, MA, NH, CT, VT).

It's about twice as far from GA to DE as from DE to NH or VT, so, yes I consider them near to you.

Interesting. We consider New England to be anything east of New York State. Delaware has always been considered "Mid-Atlantic". I guess the way I look at it is that it takes me 8 hours of driving to visit my brother in New Hampshire. It would take me a little over 10 to reach Georgia. Both are more than an easy day trip.

 

[docsoliday1]

Interesting. We consider New England to be anything east of New York State. Delaware has always been considered "Mid-Atlantic". I guess the way I look at it is that it takes me 8 hours of driving to visit my brother in New Hampshire. It would take me a little over 10 to reach Georgia. Both are more than an easy day trip.

Doing it by hours isn't a fair comparison...stopping every 2 minutes in NJ for tolls takes a long time.

When I looked it up on the map, it seemed about twice the distance from Atlanta to Delaware (Although I didn't know where) than from DE to VT or NH). I guess if you're going from Southern DE to Northern parts of VT/NH, then it would be about equidistant from Southern DE to Atlanta.

I stand corrected, but sitting would be more comfortable.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Doing it by hours isn't a fair comparison...stopping every 2 minutes in NJ for tolls takes a long time.

Excellent point! In psychological time, driving in NJ adds 5 hours to each trip.

When I looked it up on the map, it seemed about twice the distance from Atlanta to Delaware (Although I didn't know where) than from DE to VT or NH). I guess if you're going from Southern DE to Northern parts of VT/NH, then it would be about equidistant from Southern DE to Atlanta.

I stand corrected, but sitting would be more comfortable.

Just trying to explain why I don't think of New England as being that close. Technically speaking, I can be in Connecticut in about four hours, so it is much closer by that definition.

Well, sit down, then! Everybody else must be wondering what's wrong with your cubicle.

 

[docsoliday1]

Now you are always giving Taco Bell a bad rap, but I believe you told me you only ate there once. Having grown up on Taco Bell and having eaten it all my life with no ill effects, I think you just found the one with a little "extra" in their menu. However, given my adult knowledge in today's world, I prefer Del Taco over Taco Bell when given the choice. Del Taco gives you more cheese in their regular tacos than Taco Bell, even when you ask for extra cheese. But Del Taco doesn't have Nachos Supreme, which it my favorite thing from Taco Bell.

I strongly disagree. @Captain_Oblivious is not giving them a bad rap....they've earned it all by themselves. I actually like taco bell, but it doesn't like me. Within 30 minutes of having taco bell, I will be in the restroom (likely multiple times).

 

[docsoliday1]

I just don't get this. Really. I've eaten it all my life and have only once (recently actually) had a little issue. And even then not that big a deal.

Maybe they use real meat or some type of different formulation West of the Mississippi (like the different name with Hellmann's and Best Food's mayonaisse). Seems the only two people saying it's not roto rooter for your GI tract are left coast folks (CA & OR).

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

I strongly disagree. @Captain_Oblivious is not giving them a bad rap....they've earned it all by themselves. I actually like taco bell, but it doesn't like me. Within 30 minutes of having taco bell, I will be in the restroom (likely multiple times).

Maybe they use real meat or some type of different formulation West of the Mississippi (like the different name with Hellmann's and Best Food's mayonaisse). Seems the only two people saying it's not roto rooter for your GI tract are left coast folks (CA & OR).

Like I said, I was surprised Taco Bell was getting such a vigorous defense. I thought they had a pretty common effect on people.

Funnily enough, I've always referred to it as Liquid Plumber for the stomach.

 

[Steppesister]

Maybe they use real meat or some type of different formulation West of the Mississippi (like the different name with Hellmann's and Best Food's mayonaisse). Seems the only two people saying it's not roto rooter for your GI tract are left coast folks (CA & OR).

In my defense, I guess I have a pretty solid corner on the strong stomach gig. In high school, I regularly ate Der Weinerschnitzel chili cheese dogs for breakfast and have eaten pretty much any food out there including food that has sat out WAY too long in the Central Asian summer.

Then again, I gag every morning of the year as I brush my teeth. Go figure.

 

[Dugette]

Wow, quite the resort! Love the picture of your parents walking. But terrified of your horse! And bummer about the zip line being down - I'd pick that too!

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

In my defense, I guess I have a pretty solid corner on the strong stomach gig. In high school, I regularly ate Der Weinerschnitzel chili cheese dogs for breakfast and have eaten pretty much any food out there including food that has sat out WAY too long in the Central Asian summer.

I imagine if you didn't have an iron stomach before, you certainly would have developed it with your life's experiences!

Then again, I gag every morning of the year as I brush my teeth. Go figure.

We each have our cross to bear.

Wow, quite the resort! Love the picture of your parents walking. But terrified of your horse! And bummer about the zip line being down - I'd pick that too!

That was a major bummer! But on the bright side, my horse did not end up murdering me.

 

[Captain_Oblivious]

Ok, sports fans, here's the deal. We have two weeks until Sarah's surgery to correct her scoliosis. So far, everyone is doing fine, no freak-outs or anything of the sort. But that may be because we've had something going on virtually every night to distract us. Field hockey season just ended last week, so we may start finding our minds wandering toward the near future now that there are fewer events on the calendar.

I imagine the pre-op appointment 6 days before the surgery will be the date when it starts to hit home. In the meantime, please lift Sarah up in prayer as the next month or so will be a tough one for her.

I figure I have maybe 2 or 3 more updates to finish off Texas here. I'm hoping to get them in prior to the surgery date so I can have a clean break and worry about my daughter for a few days. Then, when things start returning back to normal, I can start up the Deep South trip report.

Thanks for being faithful readers!

 

[pkondz]

Prayers for Sarah of course. I never stopped.
And don't feel like you need to get this done before then. All in good time.