Family Readiness Groups

[lyeag]

I haven't had any experiences with FRG that have been helpful since dh has been on active duty. In the NG I was pretty active, but since the day he went active, it has been awful. First he switched from the NG to active and went straight to Korea. Not a call from anyone...then orders to Ft. Sill..no sponser... FRG at his unit is almost non existent, but I went to the few meetings I could make. At the battery level, 3 people showed up. Next, hd went to Iraq. I had one message on the machine from a chaplain I never met saying he would call back. He never did... Now dh is back and in a unit where there is very little info.

Am I just having a bad stretch of luck or what? I hear about all these wonderful groups and I wonder where are they?

 

[casndan]

When you find these wonderful FRG...you gimme a call and tell me about it, so maybe I can go meet with that one...

 

[powellrj]

when DS was in Iraq, I got 2 letters (he was there a year) from 2 different people telling us that they would send us updates, but they never came. I just figured it was for people who actually live at the bases. We are just parents so I figured it was low priority to send to people who aren't spouses.

 

[froglady]

My husband was a medical officer, and was deployed on a carrier for 6 months as part of a medical team. It was based in another city, so I had little or no support from other families. Sounds like you're in a similar situation; you're not part of an established, close knit group. I thank God for my wonderful neighbors and family who helped me; I was pregnant and alone, but they all went out of their way to include me in their activities.

This was 22 years ago, so the only communications were through snail mail. It would sometimes take 3 weeks for a letter to get through!

 

[BibbidiBobbidiBOO]

I have no idea!!!
Actually, when DH was active duty, support was great. When he was a company commander I had to lead one of these groups.

Now DH is in Iraq, attached to a group that is not his own reserve unit (and many states away). The only "deployed" in this unit are Captains, Majors, and LTC's, about 18 of them. Guess they think LTC wives don't need any support?? I do get a monthly e-mail newsletter from the unit, but it mostly pertains to the large group that is left behind and not deployed. Very strange situation I am in. Oh, I did get a Christmas Card from his old unit (the one he was plucked from so he could go fill a slot in this group). DH says they(those not deployed) have talked about family support in their weekly teleconferences he is in on, but it is all just talk IMHO. DH is not impressed either.
DH is my best support system thankfully.

 

[lyeag]

Thanks everyone! I really don't have much of a need for FRG, I have done very well on my own with the help of a few friends. It just sort of shocks me though, how I keep hearing about the wonderful FRG programs out there. DH got upset in Iraq when he heard that some units arranged to take turns cutting the grass for spouses of deployes people. Now I am perfectly capable of cutting the grass....but man, we all could have been down with the plague and no one in dh unit would have known!!! LOL

 

[jpmom97]

The only good thing about our FRG was that they sent out a newsletter once a month w/some info in it. Otherwise, they didn't do much at all. My husband will be back on Wed and the FRG leaders quit 2 weeks ago. Makes no sense to me.

My cousin is the FRG leader of her husbands unit and does a fantastic job! She has monthly meetings w/ guest speakers, Every Friday is ladies night out, and is always available to her wives all day every day. I speak to her about every other day and there are at least 5 women calling in while we are on the phone. She has also raised thousands of dollars as well. Her unit sounds rare though.

 

[lovemygoofy]

I was and am a FRG leader. It's one of the hardest and least appreciative jobs I have ever had. I do it because no one else wants to do all the work; they just want to know everyone's business. It's hard to know who all the wives are in the group if they come in mid stream, while the guys are away. I have tried to put a system in place so wives aren't left behind. I email one family member of each single soldier once a month but everyone who has any contact with a solider in my husband's unit has my email and phone number. We aren't deployed right now but will be by late fall. My advice would be to call anyone that you know who may know someone else that could tell you if you have a FRG. I know that each posts should have something in place to help spouses with at least info if nothing else. Honestly, if you really want to know what is going on keep calling and asking others; someone somewhere will know something. I'm not trying to be the least bit ugly either; there is a huge problem with spouses/families falling in between the cracks but you can't be found if you don't speak up. God Bless us military spouses because without us the military would fall apart

 

[lyeag]

The sad thing was I had been to FRG meetings (even though only 3 or 4 of us showed) at the battery level. Everyone knew dh left, it was in the newsletter. He went on a one for one replacement. They knew me, and knew where I was. I really didn't expect much more than a phone call once in while, but like I said, we could of all had the plague and no one in FRG or the command side would have known.

It really doesn't matter, I just was suprised. I worked very hard in the National Guard group I was in. I am not ready to get "involved" again. I am glad to hear it is better in other places!

 

[BabyTigger99]

When DH was in Qatar with the ANG this past December, the only thing I heard from the FRG was about their Christmas party, which was the day before he left to go over. Never heard from anyone else the whole time he was gone. We live about 2 and a half hours from base, so I figured that was why.

Funny thing is, when he went to Israel for 3 weeks in May, I got a phone call the day after he left from someone with the unit (not FRG) with the gentleman's work, home, and cell numbers, and if I needed anything at all, please give him a call.