I'll pray for you......

[osopecoso]

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

 

[Simba's Mom]

Here in Texas, we get that comment a lot-yes, even in Public Schools. And to respond as you did, "No, thanks, I don't need a prayer" would be next to sinful. We just say "Thank You" and move on.

 

[Mizzoufan]

I say thank you and I truly appreciate it. I believe that the greatest thing you can do.for someone is to pray for them.

 

[osopecoso]

I say thank you and I truly appreciate it. I believe that the greatest thing you can do.for someone is to pray for them.

Not in a preschool lecturing parents. If this was a Christian school then I can see that happening. Would you pray for someone who is Muslim and does not have the same beliefs as you?

 

[erin1715]

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

I think this woman sounds like she was really reaching on her delivery of "I will pray for you," as if you just told her about a real hardship you were facing. I think generally it is a nice thing to say to someone, even if you don't believe what they do. I think a simple response of "thank you" is great. But I could see how this woman was being nosy and offering more than what she needs to. But I think you should just let it go.

 

[erin1715]

Not in a preschool lecturing parents. If this was a Christian school then I can see that happening. Would you pray for someone who is Muslim and does not have the same beliefs as you?

Being a Christian, yes we would pray for Muslims (and we do).

 

[anniemae]

I would be annoyed at the assumption that you were somehow making work a priority over your dd while your poor, poor wife is burdoned while you are galavanting all over the world. It's preschool for goodness sakes. There is no need for both parents to be there for orientation. I would have said something like, "I would have loved to attend the orientation, but if I don't work, we wouldn't be able to afford this school."

As for the prayer comment, I would have responded with, "Thanks, I'll pray for you too." No, I probably would not say that LOL! I would have just responded with "thank you" and moved on. It was a harmless comment, but I'm not sure if she said it with a touch of snark mixed in or not. Either way, I would just let it go.

 

[piccolopat]

I'm Catholic and believe in prayer but I really don't see a problem with OP's response. Saying they didn't need a prayer is fine with me and it is not being mad at God either. This school person seems to be annoying on many different levels and I think if it persisted I would raise the issue with the school administration. She shouldn't be badgering people or criticizing them or their children.

 

[Southernmiss]

People don't even think. She probably thinks she evangelizing and will convert someone to her religion.

I am a church office administrator. I called our local florist a parishioner today to order flowers. I've been active in the church for 25 years with DH and our 4 almost grown kids. I've been in this role for 3 years. And 22 in another staff position.

But he doesn't see me at the Mass he attends. So he asks "Are you Catholic?" Um yes, all my life. "Oh, I never see you. I attend the 5 p.m. Mass." Well come Sunday morning at 7:30 a.m. or by the office any day of the week.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

Someone on these boards used that same nonsense on me recently while being as snarky as possible. It's very passive aggressive and in no way in good spirit.

 

[Wishing on a star]

You mentioned 'not a Christian school' . If this is a public school, this lady is pushing her personal and religious beliefs on public school families....
(if it is private... suck it up, buttercup)
I don't care WHERE this is (I am from the South)
This would def not be okay, and I wonder why a group of parents has not filed official grievances?

It really, really, bothers me that there are people who portray and make the assumptions that the South, and Christian's are 'just like this'.
I am not... And the people that I associate with are not.

 

[jliehr]

Is it a public or private pre-school?

What is your goal, to get her fired? If so, I probably would mention something about her general behavior and that you don't appreciate her judgement or comments overall (about traveling, whatever else). But they probably already know and don't care, so your other options are to just live with it or find a different pre-school.

 

[Gracie09]

I would talk to the school administration. Not only is the I'll pray for you thing passive aggressive and could be offensive, but she has no business lecturing or commenting on the lives of the families at the school. She is there to sign people in and out. period.
General comments - nice weather, have a good weekend etc fine. But this seems to go beyond that.

 

[BrinkofSunshine]

While I agree that her condescending attitude toward his not being present at the orientation/offer to pray for him was a bit condescending and not her place, I think she overstepped the line when she asked why he was angry with God. That's just a totally inappropriate thing to ask anyone, especially a parent at a school she works at.

 

[smiths02]

I would generally say thank you. This is because people are generally saying it when I faced an obstacle (even if not a big one).

If she said it as a prayer for travel kind of thing, then I would still say thank you. If it was a prayer that you are such an uninvolved parent, then I might possibly complain to the director. Not because of prayer by itself, but because of a bad attitude by front desk staff.

ETA: I didn't even think about the "angry with God." It's one thing to talk about prayer or something, but she's not meant to delve into a religious discussion with you at drop off.

 

[Domo]

I've said it before, but have regretted it, as it very quickly struck me that the person in question would take offence which was hardly the intention. I meant no malice by it.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

what do you say when someone tells you that.

Happened this morning. I got of traveling for work so I was able to bring my daughter to school (preschool) and meet her new teacher since I was not in town for orientation. The lady who greets everyone at the front desk is very annoying and lectures parents about their kids (lectured my wife that my daughter should not dance so much......). I walk in with my daughter and drop her off to her room. While walking out, she makes a snarky remark that all parents should be present for orientation. I told her I was traveling for work but got all the information from my wife. She says "oh your poor wife all alone while you travel the world". Keep in mind I was in Colorado, not exactly international. Then she says "I will pray for you". Thank goodness my daughter already went to class. I said "no thanks, I don't need a prayer". This set her off. She says "why are you angry with god". Remember, this is not a Christian school. They don't do prayer there and do not teach the Bible. I tell her she has no right to lecture people on religion, especially at a preschool. She rolled her eyes and laughed while walking away. Should I report her or let it slide.

If you felt inclined to report her the only reason I would be doing it is because it's incredible unprofessional for someone to talk to people the way she has. And I don't necessarily mean the "I'll pray for you comment".

Generally speaking people say that and they mean it in a good heartfelt way not a preachy way (though yes some do-those types of people I have little appreciation for and try as hard as I can to just ignore them).

She does sound preachy for sure but it's the lectures, inappropriate comments about "your poor wife...", "angry with god", the confrontational approach she has that I would have more of the issue with. At the very least the powers that be should be aware to watch out. It's entirely possible other parents/guardians feel the same way in that they don't appreciate being talked to the way it appears she seems to.

 

[donaldbuzz&minnie]

That would bug me too. Sounds like this woman has a control thing and thinks she's found a sure-fire way to keep the upper hand. You can usually tell the difference between someone who genuinely is caring and someone who is using faith to hurt.

 

[pryncess527]

In general, I say Thank you.

I'm an athiest, but I was raised in the South and 9 times out of 10, that person is just trying to convey their best wishes and while I may not share their faith, I am happy to accept their positive thoughts in whatever manner they send them

The situation you describe in the OP though, sounds like that last 1 out of 10, where the person is not trying to convey best wishes but instead express a "bless your heart" type of condescending sympathy where none is needed or wanted. I'd desire to have a snarky reply ready, but likely wouldn't.

 

[dclpluto]

Thanks you