Is there a difference (dating)

[mjkacmom]

I was just going to say, “talking” seems to be the new term thrown into the mix. What is THAT defined as?

It means texting, FaceTiming, hanging out- right now ds17 has been talking to a girl for a couple of months, it’s pre-commitment. He’s been at her house, she’s been here, it probably requires a Valentine’s Day gift, but it’s not official.

 

[sam_gordon]

I always think of dating as not that serious. For instance, some people are set up on "blind dates." People who are meeting for the first time. No one "blind sees" someone. So, to me, seeing someone is when the couple are more serious about each other.

But the blind date doesn't mean they're "dating". It means they're going on a date. To me both terms mean you have some kind of history of going out together and you plan on that continuing. If you went out with someone (blind date or not) once and didn't click, and have no plans to go out again, would you say you've "dated" them? I don't think so.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I was just going to say, “talking” seems to be the new term thrown into the mix. What is THAT defined as?

IDK if it's new.

Back in my younger days you IM'd each other on AOL instant messenger, or you had MySpace, or you actually talked on the phone, texting wasn't really as common given that cell phone usage wasn't quite as prevalent plus you had limited texting, free calling after X time, etc and then there was the FB days when they removed the college e-mail requirement (which actually came a few months before I started college go figure).

I think it's just different means as times change. IM-ing each other could be perceived to be the same as texting each other if you're saying you're "talking to somone"

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I always think of dating as not that serious. For instance, some people are set up on "blind dates." People who are meeting for the first time. No one "blind sees" someone. So, to me, seeing someone is when the couple are more serious about each other.

. . . Of course, there's always the case of when one person is more serious than the other person is and tgey haven't really discussed it. The person less serious may say, I'm seeing someone. Whereas, the person more serious may say, "I have a boyfriend, (or girlfriend,)" to establish they think the relationship is more serious.

On the other hand I've def. heard people say "I'm seeing someone" and then a clarifying question from someone else of "is it serious". That becomes the hard part of making the distinction that one means casual and another means serious I guess and the topic of this thread lol.

People have described themselves as seriously seeing someone the same as casually seeing someone the same as describing themselves seriously dating someone the same as casually dating someone.

 

[ronandannette]

I see them both as casual. According to my kids, dating now means exclusive, talking means casual.

Back in the prehistoric days of my youth, the term used to be "going together" or "going with". If two people weren't already "going together" they were perfectly free to find someone to "go with".

 

[disneychrista]

Back in the prehistoric days of my youth, the term used to be "going together" or "going with". If two people weren't already "going together" they were perfectly free to find someone to "go with".

It was "going out" in my neck of the woods. You were either "going out" with someone or you weren't. A guy would ask you to "go out" and then you were a couple.

My daughters' father asked me out on a date and after that we were a couple.

 

[ronandannette]

It was "going out" in my neck of the woods. You were either "going out" with someone or you weren't. A guy would ask you to "go out" and then you were a couple.

My daughters' father asked me out on a date and after that we were a couple.

Just curious - absolutely no snark intended - you committed to a life-partner by being asked out on one date? Were you quite young? If so, did your parents and/or friends have anything to say bout it? I wasn't really allowed to date until I was 17, but if I had implied wanting to settle down with the first boy after the first date, my Dad would not have stood for it.

 

[disneychrista]

Just curious - absolutely no snark intended - you committed to a life-partner by being asked out on one date?

No. Just that we were a couple. We were "going out."

It ended up being a life time commitment since we ended up with 2 children.

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

I would almost think they are interchangeable.

 

[disykat]

So if you are considered dating if you agree to one date, how does one get to know if they are interested?

To me, dating means going on dates,
but seeing sort of implies some sort of continuous timeline.

 

[Imzadi]

To me, dating means going on dates,
but seeing sort of implies some sort of continuous timeline.

Exactly. To me, dating is going on three, four, five , etc., dates. Yet each time, neither is sure they want to continue until the current date is over. Whereas, seeing is a continuous timeline. Where you both know you like each other enough to have been seeing each other for a while. Yet you don't know how serious it will be.

 

[cheryl.UK]

Over here in the UK, the 'young folk' now seem to be using the term 'we're talking' meaning that the relationship is new and/or not serious.

 

[DawnM]

The middle schoolers I work with use the word dating all the time and I find it quite comical. They don't actually go out on dates. It is a term that means the same as what we used to mean when we would say we were "going together." My mom's generation used to say, "going steady."

 

[mrodgers]

Same to me.

 

[design_mom]

To me, they're pretty much synonymous.

The funny thing is that to me, if I were *forced* to say which was more serious and which was more casual, I'd probably say that "seeing someone" was more casual than dating. To me "seeing someone" sounds like you're trying to be coy and don't want to put a label on it. While "dating," is making a statement.