Is this person on FB in charge of Fish Extender?

[Eluna]

If this isn’t the right place to ask this, then I apologize.

I first read about FE on here ages ago and now that I’m finally going on a Disney cruise I wanted to join a group and participate. There wasn’t yet a group for my sailing so I decided to start one. I googled around and found an FE group on Facebook. I joined and was told in order to form a group for my sailing I would have to talk with the owner/admin if the page, get approved etc. It was kind of an ordeal? But whatever. The group was established and we went about our merry way.

But something that my group and I have noticed (we have discussed this at great length) is how controlling this particular Admin/Page Owner is. The FE Page is huge and has a lot of members. At first I liked it because it was awesome to see so many people posting their gifts; it was a great page to look at to get ideas. But every other post is shut down by this particular Admin. She limits what people can talk about. She has tried to interfere with our group and how it is run. She seems to be a “rule follower”, which is fine, but I’m not so okay with it if I feel like it is interfering with my own group.

I became friends with another person who is in another cruise date group and she said that some time ago, this Admin was in her group because she was sailing with them. She said it was horrible having them in the group because they were controlling everything, deleting posts that even mentioned “alcohol” etc. Yikes.

What my group and I were wondering: can we ask to be unlinked from this page? Is this Admin in charge of FE? Did she invent the concept? Do we have to abide by all of her rules? We all agree that we just don’t want to deal with her anymore but we aren’t sure if we have to go through her in order to participate.

Thanks!

 

[DisneyParkFan]

Hi there,

You may get a post or reply that we are not allowed to post links to FB here. I do not know if that applies to questions about FB and administrators of cruise sites there. Please do not feel offended or criticized if this happens. it's not personal just policy. I kinda did at first when I posted a FB link about a cruise I was going on (someone else started the group and I was sharing information to curious people here). Then as Elsa sings: "Let it go, let it go!" SO I had to let it go, let it go.

On a personal note, I appreciate reading your post. I am an administrator for a DCL group on that other site, and stopped to think if I was being too controlling. I agonized over declining a person who requested to be added but didn't have a profile page with any information (photos, interests, friends), respond to a message, or was invited by or knew someone sailing in our group. After a month, it appeared they may have requested by mistake or were just fishing for a FB group to join but really weren't cruising. We have had a few people leave our group because they switched sailings. They deleted themselves and I was surprised when their posts were deleted with them. (I pinned one of their posts about us introducing ourselves to each other) I will remember what you have written here. BTW I asked someone to take the lead on organizing a mixology class/group for our group because they were interested. Our FE groups isn't up and running yet but probably will in about a month or two. I guess we'll either ask about Meet 'n'n Greets at that time or wait until we are a little bit closer to the cruise.

Please enjoy your cruise sailing!

 

[nearlyfallinstar]

No one owns the FE idea. You are absolutely allowed to leave that group and have an exchange among those in your own group.

 

[dcassetta]

Set up your own group on Facebook or invite people from your group to come over here to the DIS to make their FE arrangements. I see no reason to allow someone who is not on your actual cruise to dictate how you can organize your FE exchange

 

[Eluna]

Hi there,

You may get a post or reply that we are not allowed to post links to FB here. I do not know if that applies to questions about FB and administrators of cruise sites there. Please do not feel offended or criticized if this happens. it's not personal just policy. I kinda did at first when I posted a FB link about a cruise I was going on (someone else started the group and I was sharing information to curious people here). Then as Elsa sings: "Let it go, let it go!" SO I had to let it go, let it go.

On a personal note, I appreciate reading your post. I am an administrator for a DCL group on that other site, and stopped to think if I was being too controlling. I agonized over declining a person who requested to be added but didn't have a profile page with any information (photos, interests, friends), respond to a message, or was invited by or knew someone sailing in our group. After a month, it appeared they may have requested by mistake or were just fishing for a FB group to join but really weren't cruising. We have had a few people leave our group because they switched sailings. They deleted themselves and I was surprised when their posts were deleted with them. (I pinned one of their posts about us introducing ourselves to each other) I will remember what you have written here. BTW I asked someone to take the lead on organizing a mixology class/group for our group because they were interested. Our FE groups isn't up and running yet but probably will in about a month or two. I guess we'll either ask about Meet 'n'n Greets at that time or wait until we are a little bit closer to the cruise.

Please enjoy your cruise sailing!

Thanks for the reply!

Yeah the threads aren’t being deleted because people are leaving; they are being deleted by the admin herself. On the FB FE Page she does this a lot. She will delete comments, turn off replies on a post and then put up an image with a Disney character on it that says the post is closed or whatever. Her page, her rules but it’s annoying the way she carries it on into other groups.

 

[Eluna]

Set up your own group on Facebook or invite people from your group to come over here to the DIS to make their FE arrangements. I see no reason to allow someone who is not on your actual cruise to dictate how you can organize your FE exchange

Exactly! I think we are going to do this. I just assumed that this person was in charge because she runs the FE Page and has over 30k members on there alone. She constantly reminds members of the “rules of FE” and she’s extremely pushy and demanding. I suppose that’s why we assumed it was her idea.

 

[Carey_B]

I'm quite lucky that I've found an easy going group on facebook, I've been added as an admin but as far as I'm aware no posts get deleted. It's nice getting to know people who'll be on the same cruise as we're trying to organise a meet up. If you find it too restrictive I would definitely leave and start another group, she doesn't own anything.

 

[vgrandy]

It's hard because she runs the page that everyone lists their FE groups on. If your not listed there people may have a harder time finding you. I share in your frustration in how she runs her groups. I have thought about leaving as well but that is where the people are. She gets the final say in everything and sometimes she is wrong. You absolutely don't need her approval to start a group. I know she has been known to start and run groups for cruises she is not on. I don't think it's ok. Best of luck navigating this.

 

[cmph]

Yeesh. I haven't joined a FE specific fb group, just sailing-specific fb groups. If you can find your sailing-specific group, I'd highly recommend going that route instead. You will probably have to answer a question that proves you really are sailing on that cruise, but nothing insane. Mine have had FE set up, plus helpful talk about pre/post-stays, traveling to/from, ports, etc.

Watch out for the travel agent sponsored ones. You will be able to tell, though, based upon the feed in the group. I would have liked to do FE through disboards, but the reality is that the meet groups here are not well-populated anymore (and some times non-existent). btw, my understanding is disboards is where FE originated - not through any control-freak fb person!

 

[tigerchic89]

I was a member of that FB page, I had to "mute'" it because she was so over the top controlling

 

[n2mm]

We had an admin like that on my last cruise FB group. We called her the queen because of some of her in control actions. She would get ticked when she would post incorrect info and veterans would correct her. It was only her second cruise!

 

[Beth D]

Yeesh. I haven't joined a FE specific fb group, just sailing-specific fb groups. If you can find your sailing-specific group, I'd highly recommend going that route instead. You will probably have to answer a question that proves you really are sailing on that cruise, but nothing insane. Mine have had FE set up, plus helpful talk about pre/post-stays, traveling to/from, ports, etc.

Watch out for the travel agent sponsored ones. You will be able to tell, though, based upon the feed in the group. I would have liked to do FE through disboards, but the reality is that the meet groups here are not well-populated anymore (and some times non-existent). btw, my understanding is disboards is where FE originated - not through any control-freak fb person!

This, exactly! Our first cruise, 6 years ago I joined our meet group on DIS, did the meet up first day, the FE exchange, and everyone in our group chatted extensively in the thread. I even connected with several families and shared an excursion with them

Next 2 cruises I joined the threads for our sailing, but it seemed each one spent more time on fb than on disboards. I’ve not even watched the thread for our sailing in a couple weeks, as everone on it points to the meet group on fb.

I am not on facebook, have never been, and will never go there. It’s rather sad how so much fun stuff from the dis has migrated there...

 

[FigmentSpark]

I'm like you, Beth D, I don't do FB. I don't want to start doing FB, but that is where the action seems to be.

Perhaps the OP could invite her FE participants to the DIS page to continue with the FE for her cruise. Registration is free and more importantly, free of that control freak.

 

[mousefan73]

I find it nice that a F B Group is run with certain rules as many try to sell and sell... but it is extreme you cannot even post a link to etsy if some one loves what you post and wants information. there is a sister group for selling.. havent been on. but wonder if this person also is trying to make cash in some way. I mean she does put a lot of effort into her F B Group. Its actually really well run.. Run like a full-time job.. makes me wonder if 1. she has so much time and love for Disney 2. or plus making cash and of course wants no competitors.

 

[mousefan73]

This, exactly! Our first cruise, 6 years ago I joined our meet group on DIS, did the meet up first day, the FE exchange, and everyone in our group chatted extensively in the thread. I even connected with several families and shared an excursion with them

Next 2 cruises I joined the threads for our sailing, but it seemed each one spent more time on fb than on disboards. I’ve not even watched the thread for our sailing in a couple weeks, as everone on it points to the meet group on fb.

I am not on facebook, have never been, and will never go there. It’s rather sad how so much fun stuff from the dis has migrated there...

I find F B easier and offers more options than here for a closed group, that has discussion AND Kollaboration. Our group has excel files for the groups.. Here you would have to block post 1 and then always edit.. there is no section or folder system.. A thread here is simply organized by date. Also I like how with F B you actually see the person in your group. Granted its a give and take... I let them see me etc... and they know my name. I have no problem with it. Its a closed group so per FB setting my Friends dont see the posts and they are not personal FB friends with me so they dont see my personal stuff. Win win.

 

[CamColt]

Here on the Dis we can only speak for what happens here, not on other social media sites. Of course you are under no obligation to participate in anything you don't want to. If you would like to start a cruise meet thread here on the Dis, or post to one that is already created for your cruise, feel free to do so. With enough interest you may be able to start a FE Exchange here.

With that said, here is my opinion, FWIW. These Cruise Meets threads originally started to meet and get to know your fellow cruisers. Some hit it off and wanted to be table mates, some made plans for meets, and others even planned excursions together. I've been involved with some groups that met up once, were very casual and just said hi to each other around the ship. I've also been in some where we became friends, all dined together (almost 40 of us) and really did a lot with each other all hours of the day.

The FEs were something that grew out of that planning and became a fun little thing to do. I don't mean this to anyone in particular but I am seeing more and more of people just wanting to do a FE for the gifts and they make that so important, they don't care about cruise planning and anticipating the cruise with others. I can honestly say, I only remember a few of the gifts we received but the people I spent time with are still my friends here and on social media, we exchange Christmas cards, etc... We all have great memories of the time we spent together. IMO, too much emphasis is being put on doing a FE Exchange and the fun part of the planning is being overlooked.

So, I guess what I'm trying to point out is don't get so caught up in FEs that the fun and anticipation of the cruise is gone because you are getting upset/stressed. Enjoy your cruise!

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Here on the Dis we can only speak for what happens here, not on other social media sites. Of course you are under no obligation to participate in anything you don't want to. If you would like to start a cruise meet thread here on the Dis, or post to one that is already created for your cruise, feel free to do so. With enough interest you may be able to start a FE Exchange here.

With that said, here is my opinion, FWIW. These Cruise Meets threads originally started to meet and get to know your fellow cruisers. Some hit it off and wanted to be table mates, some made plans for meets, and others even planned excursions together. I've been involved with some groups that met up once, were very casual and just said hi to each other around the ship. I've also been in some where we became friends, all dined together (almost 40 of us) and really did a lot with each other all hours of the day.

The FEs were something that grew out of that planning and became a fun little thing to do. I don't mean this to anyone in particular but I am seeing more and more of people just wanting to do a FE for the gifts and they make that so important, they don't care about cruise planning and anticipating the cruise with others. I can honestly say, I only remember a few of the gifts we received but the people I spent time with are still my friends here and on social media, we exchange Christmas cards, etc... We all have great memories of the time we spent together. IMO, too much emphasis is being put on doing a FE Exchange and the fun part of the planning is being overlooked.

So, I guess what I'm trying to point out is don't get so caught up in FEs that the fun and anticipation of the cruise is gone because you are getting upset/stressed. Enjoy your cruise!

Well, said. I, too, remember when FEs were just one thing that was done on Cruise Meet threads. And not everyone did them.

 

[vgrandy]

I find it nice that a F B Group is run with certain rules as many try to sell and sell... but it is extreme you cannot even post a link to etsy if some one loves what you post and wants information. there is a sister group for selling.. havent been on. but wonder if this person also is trying to make cash in some way. I mean she does put a lot of effort into her F B Group. Its actually really well run.. Run like a full-time job.. makes me wonder if 1. she has so much time and love for Disney 2. or plus making cash and of course wants no competitors.

She does order things in bulk and then sells it to others. I believe there is an upcharge for her time.

 

[dcassetta]

Here on the Dis we can only speak for what happens here, not on other social media sites. Of course you are under no obligation to participate in anything you don't want to. If you would like to start a cruise meet thread here on the Dis, or post to one that is already created for your cruise, feel free to do so. With enough interest you may be able to start a FE Exchange here.

With that said, here is my opinion, FWIW. These Cruise Meets threads originally started to meet and get to know your fellow cruisers. Some hit it off and wanted to be table mates, some made plans for meets, and others even planned excursions together. I've been involved with some groups that met up once, were very casual and just said hi to each other around the ship. I've also been in some where we became friends, all dined together (almost 40 of us) and really did a lot with each other all hours of the day.

The FEs were something that grew out of that planning and became a fun little thing to do. I don't mean this to anyone in particular but I am seeing more and more of people just wanting to do a FE for the gifts and they make that so important, they don't care about cruise planning and anticipating the cruise with others. I can honestly say, I only remember a few of the gifts we received but the people I spent time with are still my friends here and on social media, we exchange Christmas cards, etc... We all have great memories of the time we spent together. IMO, too much emphasis is being put on doing a FE Exchange and the fun part of the planning is being overlooked.

So, I guess what I'm trying to point out is don't get so caught up in FEs that the fun and anticipation of the cruise is gone because you are getting upset/stressed. Enjoy your cruise!

I don't participate in FE anymore except to pixie dust people. My favorite part of cruise meet threads, whether here or other places, is getting to know people, and sharing info. I also enjoy the pre-arrange mixologies.

 

[CamColt]

Well, said. I, too, remember when FEs were just one thing that was done on Cruise Meet threads. And not everyone did them.

Simpler times...the good old days.