No more manners

We go to wdw 2x a year. I rarely see men stand up and offer a woman their seat on the bus. Is it just me or are men lacking manners. My father would have slapped me to the other side of the bus if I would have not given a lady or child a seat on the bus.
Are we to assume that your feeling is that between two complete strangers you feel the woman is less able to tolerate the discomfort of standing on a bus? Or that the man is less deserving of a comfortable ride?

I'm happy to shift or stand to keep a couple together or a family together whether that means giving my seat up to a woman or man. If I see someone in obvious distress I'm glad to offer the comfort of my seat, again regardless of gender. Likewise, if someone, man or woman, makes a request for a seat. That is a charitable grace I am all to willing to extend.

What I would never do is presume upon the desires of people I do not know. I would never assume that a woman has more to gain from gaining a seat than a man has to lose by losing it. And I would never suppose myself morally entitled to impugn the actions of people who's situation in this matter I am oblivious to like a coxcomb in a henhouse. I was raised better.
 
I'm a woman and I'm healthy. I'm perfectly capable of standing on a bus. At the end of the day, when my feet hurt, I will wait for the next bus if I want a guaranteed seat. However, I would rather stand and let my mom sit. If I'm wearing tennis shoes and shorts, there's really no practical need for a man to give up his seat for me.

With that said, I will hold a door open for others. Regardless of gender. And I will say thank you if someone holds the door open for me. We can all benefit from being kind to each other.
 
I would feel super crappy if I sat while someone who needed it was standing. I don't care how tired my feet were I would move my lazy butt up and give it to the mom holding a sleeping child, disabled, or elderly.

I would as well, but I refuse to accept that because I am a 60 YO woman I am entitled to a seat. I am not.

The OP was complaining that women were not offered seats by men who were seated, not that there were people who clearly needed seats who were ignored.

I stand for anyone holding a child, kids whose parents are clearly holding too many in one spot, and for anyone who looks like they need my seat more than I.
I might accept a seat when offered when I am exhausted, but I do not take one unless that is the case. Everyone on that bus is tired.



Would folks who would give their seat to a mom holding a sleeping child also give their seat to a dad holding a sleeping child? I tend to offer my seat to anyone holding a sleeping child.

I offer my seat to anyone who needs it, and many times when I have offered my seat to a man holding a baby and the seat was refused, I get up anyway.
 
We go to wdw 2x a year. I rarely see men stand up and offer a woman their seat on the bus. Is it just me or are men lacking manners. My father would have slapped me to the other side of the bus if I would have not given a lady or child a seat on the bus.

I don't see it as a lack of manners. I think that men are just as entitled to sit on the bus as a woman if they were in line first and got the seat, it should be their seat.
 
We go to wdw 2x a year. I rarely see men stand up and offer a woman their seat on the bus. Is it just me or are men lacking manners. My father would have slapped me to the other side of the bus if I would have not given a lady or child a seat on the bus.

This is the norm everywhere, not just Disney. This past weekend I was at BWI airport returning my rental car. There was a line about 75 people deep for the bus to the terminal. I watched as 4 elderly people had to come off the bus because they were not able to stand and no one gave up a seat. As it pulled off there were plenty of folks who "looked able" to stand but they either didn't see the elderly or didn't want to give up their seat. Then a few more got on to stand after they got off who were able/willing to stand. So the 4 elderly that exit the bus were first to board the next bus that pulled up. It just common now. A couple families who had small kids and didn't want to wait in line just jumped in a taxi as there were several there waiting.
 
For those that think a man should give up his seat for a woman, just because she is a woman, consider that the man may need to sit. On our Spring break trip this year, my husband was not feeling well several of the days. One of the days we were in the park and he got ill. He spiked a fever, he was throwing up, dizzy and just not well. We left the park and were the first ones at the bus stop, and we sat near the front of the bus when it arrived. As usual, the bus was pretty crowded, and there were a lot of people standing. There were two women, both probably a little younger than us (we both are turning 50 later this year), and they were standing directly in front of us and were both making comments about how rude it was that this MAN was sitting down right there and hadn't offered his seat to one of them. Obviously they didn't know that he had been throwing up and on the verge of passing out just a little while ago, but they were quite vocal about the fact that he was the one being rude (pot, kettle...), but I thought that their complaining was extremely rude, especially given how worried I was about my husband at that point.

So yes, that man might not be offering a seat to the women around him. He might really need it.
 
this is exactly why judging others is so wrong. outward appearances mean nothing. Many appear well and healthy but may not be

if a seat is important you may wait for the next bus, drive or grab an uber/cab

do not expect anyone to give up their seat, there is no entitlement to sit if you are the last one on the standing room only bus
 


For those that think a man should give up his seat for a woman, just because she is a woman, consider that the man may need to sit. On our Spring break trip this year, my husband was not feeling well several of the days. One of the days we were in the park and he got ill. He spiked a fever, he was throwing up, dizzy and just not well. We left the park and were the first ones at the bus stop, and we sat near the front of the bus when it arrived. As usual, the bus was pretty crowded, and there were a lot of people standing. There were two women, both probably a little younger than us (we both are turning 50 later this year), and they were standing directly in front of us and were both making comments about how rude it was that this MAN was sitting down right there and hadn't offered his seat to one of them. Obviously they didn't know that he had been throwing up and on the verge of passing out just a little while ago, but they were quite vocal about the fact that he was the one being rude (pot, kettle...), but I thought that their complaining was extremely rude, especially given how worried I was about my husband at that point.

So yes, that man might not be offering a seat to the women around him. He might really need it.

I'm sorry that your husband got sick. If it were my DH and I heard these women saying that I might have said something like "if you want his seat, would you be OK if he suddenly passed out on you or upchucked his lunch in your lap because he is not feeling well?".

I'll be 59 this year and NEVER expect a man to give up his seat for me. It is very nice when a man does, and I always let him know it is appreciated. I will offer my seat to others who clearly look like they need it more than me if I am feeling up to standing that day. I am in the camp that individuals are solely responsible for their own comfort on public transit. If you absolutely can't stand on a bus, there are many other options open to you that may better meet your needs. DH & I try to avoid the buses and prefer other modes of transportation now. It's a small price to pay to make sure our needs are met.
 
I don't judge anyone. You have no idea what's going on with the "sitter". My family will offer seats to others when we can, but sometimes we just can't. I have issues with my knee and hip and I now use a scooter. I am just not stable enough to stand. My husband stopped going on our trips several years ago when his congestive heart failure first started - he can't handle the heat or walking and is too embarrassed to use a scooter. Both of my daughters (age 13 and adult) have autonomic disorders and are prone to passing out - we don't want that happening on a bus. My grandson is only 2 but is non-mobile and will be in an adaptive stroller.
 
I realize the logistics aren't possible but really, no one should be standing on a bus anyway. I was standing on a Disney bus one time and the driver had to stop suddenly. Luckily, no one was hurt.
 
I realize the logistics aren't possible but really, no one should be standing on a bus anyway. I was standing on a Disney bus one time and the driver had to stop suddenly. Luckily, no one was hurt.

It wasn't luck it was the way the buses are designed. Which is why there is so much standing room. If it wasn't safe it wouldn't be allowed.
 
I do think manners are declining and a sense of entitlement (I got here first therefore it is now MY SEAT you want a seat wait for the next bus) is rising. And some of the comments in this thread just seem to prove just that.

Both my fiance and I would offer up our seats to an elderly couple or a family with kids that were asleep or too young stand or someone who just looked like they needed a little kindness. He would offer to get up for a nearby woman or child or disabled person before I would, because he knows that there are others more in need. If you have hidden disabilities or whatever fine, but I don't think that's the majority of people either on this thread or in the situation.

We also gave our floats to a young family when we left Cabana Bay because we didn't need them. And yes, we specifically looked for a young family, because they would use them most. And he'll hold the door for a young father or mother with their hands full. Our best friends have 4 kids and the oldest 3 boys (whom are 4, 4, and 3) will adorably race to try to get the door for me, their mom, or their baby sister, but also if their Dad is carrying something. It's just like saying please or thank you, yeah, there are exceptions, but in general it now seems to be about let me get where I need to be or I was here first rather than let me help those around even if it means slight discomfort for me.
 
It's all about consideration for others! :) I ride public transit all the time in my home city. The unspoken and very-rarely-enforced rules are: Seniors, Mobility Devices and Strollers first, then everyone else. I get commented rudely at a lot by transit users who don't understand my consideration as I block the loading area as the bus pulls up, as I am yelling for all the strollers and seniors to line up at the door first and let them go in front of me.

At Disney it's a little different because a large number of guests have strollers and also are seniors and many also have mobility devices. It's not like public transit....

At Disney the ECVs are loaded either first or last, depends, I've seen it both ways. There's a special spot for them and more tie-downs than on a typical city transit vehicle. So I'm not blocking the door for able-bodied patrons while the Mobility Devices are boarding. Nearly everyone has kids, so next you just look around and see if there's any guests who are really struggling. Single parents? Grandparents who don't usually break down the stroller? The man who looks pale-faced in the heat and wobbly? Person with no seat who is hanging onto a pole and clutching a baby? YOU guys get offered my seat! :D Or my DD's seat, I will have her sit on my lap or cling to my leg so you can have the seat.

Whatever gets us all to the Parks as soon as possible without starting drama or wearing anyone down before they get to a 6-mile MK hike that day!
 
I think getting on a bus expecting someone to give you a seat is the definition of feeling entitled.
I have to agree.

I am in a position of always needing a seat.

If I am not using my scooter, I always make sure that there are seats available before I board.
 
I think getting on a bus expecting someone to give you a seat is the definition of feeling entitled.
100% agree.

I can only control myself. I can not control other people. As such, if I need a seat, then I am responsible for getting myself a seat. In no way should I expect someone else to give me a seat.

So while some people moan about "loss of manners", I wonder whatever happened to having personal responsibility.
 
I do think manners are declining and a sense of entitlement (I got here first therefore it is now MY SEAT you want a seat wait for the next bus) is rising. And some of the comments in this thread just seem to prove just that.

Both my fiance and I would offer up our seats to an elderly couple or a family with kids that were asleep or too young stand or someone who just looked like they needed a little kindness. He would offer to get up for a nearby woman or child or disabled person before I would, because he knows that there are others more in need. If you have hidden disabilities or whatever fine, but I don't think that's the majority of people either on this thread or in the situation.

We also gave our floats to a young family when we left Cabana Bay because we didn't need them. And yes, we specifically looked for a young family, because they would use them most. And he'll hold the door for a young father or mother with their hands full. Our best friends have 4 kids and the oldest 3 boys (whom are 4, 4, and 3) will adorably race to try to get the door for me, their mom, or their baby sister, but also if their Dad is carrying something. It's just like saying please or thank you, yeah, there are exceptions, but in general it now seems to be about let me get where I need to be or I was here first rather than let me help those around even if it means slight discomfort for me.

I'm not so sure you understand what "entitled" really means.
The people who were in line and boarded first are actually the ones entitled to a bus seat.
People who feel that they should have a seat just because they are who they are (a woman, a pregnant woman, a parent holding a sleeping child) are the ones who actually have a misguided sense of entitlement.

This thread started out because the OP thought it was rude that nobody offered their seat to the women on the bus. It is not about helping people in need like the elderly, disabled or others in clear need of a seat.
 
I do think manners are declining and a sense of entitlement (I got here first therefore it is now MY SEAT you want a seat wait for the next bus) is rising. And some of the comments in this thread just seem to prove just that.

Both my fiance and I would offer up our seats to an elderly couple or a family with kids that were asleep or too young stand or someone who just looked like they needed a little kindness. He would offer to get up for a nearby woman or child or disabled person before I would, because he knows that there are others more in need. If you have hidden disabilities or whatever fine, but I don't think that's the majority of people either on this thread or in the situation.

We also gave our floats to a young family when we left Cabana Bay because we didn't need them. And yes, we specifically looked for a young family, because they would use them most. And he'll hold the door for a young father or mother with their hands full. Our best friends have 4 kids and the oldest 3 boys (whom are 4, 4, and 3) will adorably race to try to get the door for me, their mom, or their baby sister, but also if their Dad is carrying something. It's just like saying please or thank you, yeah, there are exceptions, but in general it now seems to be about let me get where I need to be or I was here first rather than let me help those around even if it means slight discomfort for me.

I must ask, to the bolded, what makes a woman more in need in your scenario? You didn't specify woman with child, or old woman, just woman.
 
I'm not so sure you understand what "entitled" really means.
The people who were in line and boarded first are actually the ones entitled to a bus seat.
People who feel that they should have a seat just because they are who they are (a woman, a pregnant woman, a parent holding a sleeping child) are the ones who actually have a misguided sense of entitlement.

This thread started out because the OP thought it was rude that nobody offered their seat to the women on the bus. It is not about helping people in need like the elderly, disabled or others in clear need of a seat.
I agree it is different than the OP but this thread has morphed into if you need a seat you should wait. But some the responses seem harsh against those who are dismayed at the loss of curtousey. How dare you expect common curtousy or have some reason you need to get back or think that maybe you'd rather risk standing on a bus then standing for 10 minutes until the next bus. I was here first and you must assume I have a good reason to stay seated. Sorry, I see someone perfectly able bodied suggesting the woman with a baby should wait rather than give her their seat in going to assume your rude.
 
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