ADHD???..sorry kinda long

[RF536]

We are just starting the process of having DS6 evaluated. We have seen a therapist 3 times and he has now referred us out to I believe a psychologist to have him evaluated for ADHD. While DH and I both agree there is a problem, we are not convinced that ADHD is the the problem, or at least not the only problem. I am looking of any suggestions of things to read, questions to ask, what ever information you can provide because we are feeling overwhelmed and we don't don't know anyone who has gone through this process.

We have been seeing the problems for a couple of years, but the doctor seemed the think it was just a phase, until his teacher asked me about it and said that the mood swings were not normal.

His teacher as said that he doesn't have a problem sitting and doing the work, it is the mood swings causing problems.

DS can be as nice as can be and then you literally see things change especially in his eyes and he is just a mean and angry as can be. Then with time and work he is back to his normal self. Another problem we are seeing is that his reactions to things are out of proportion to what happened. Being told "no" is enough to send him running through the house crying, screaming and flapping his arms. He does this even though throwing a fit never gets him what he wants and he knows this.

This is the same boy who will spend hours watching or doing something that interests him. A couple of weeks ago we went to Cedar Point and he spent an hour and a half watching them make a blown glass fish and dragon, he would have watched longer but they took a break. He will also spend 2-3 hours at a time working with DH on these 3-D wooden puzzles that he likes.

Other things we have noticed is that he will collect things, plastic easter eggs, the plastic M&M tubes, tic tac containers, misc. things in a bag that he used to carry everywhere with him. He will also become obsessed with things until he figures them out. For a while we was obsessed with telling time on an analog clock. He studied clocks and kept asking questions until he could tell time, he started kindergarten being able to tell time.



Thanks

 

[QueenGoblin]

Kudos to you for being proactive and asking questions. I sometimes wonder if ADHD has become a convenient diagnosis for any child who is acting out a bit differently from his/her peers.

It is hard to tell from a post, but your son sounds a bit like my daughter. She has an incredible attention span too, but sometimes she is just in the mood to fight and will throw and absolute fit over something, even though she knows throwing a fit won't get her anywhere. She is also very sensitive to sounds and does not like anyone messing with her ears. Her preschool teacher flirted with the idea of having her professionally evaluated, but as she got to know her, decided she was just "strong willed." We talked to her pediatrician about some of these issues, and he suggested we read the book "Raising your Spirited Child." He said to tell him if that book described her, and if not, let him know and he would look into further evaluation. We haven't gottent he book yet, but we plan to read it asap.

ETA: Our DD also has obsessions. Right now, it is the number 4 (she is 4) so she has to have 4 things for breakfast, and she has to sit in row 4, ride in car 4 at the park, etc. When we were at WDW, the obsession was yellow and she cried all through Dumbo b/c she didn't get the one with the yellow hat. She doesn't collect though.

I hope you get some helpful posts, I just wanted to let you know you weren't alone with a child who doesn't fit neatly into any of the boxes. I would read up on ADHD and the autism spectrum, mostly so you can ask really good questions next time your son is evaluated. It might give you some clues as to what should be mentioned to your docs/therapists.

Good Luck!

 

[Forevryoung]

You asked for suggestions and I will give you another outlet to look into and consider but before I do (and potentially scare you) I will tell you that NO diagnosis will change who your son is- whatever it is he is still the same boy he was 5 minutes before you were told.

Another thing for me to say is that you never know what the future holds and don't always believe drs outlooks for the future.

Your son sounds a lot like me when I was that age and still today- you might want to consider looking into the diagnosis of bipolar disorder. Yes, it is "fairly" rare in children but they are making the diagnosis younger and younger.

Remember that you don't have to have a diagnosis to seek treatment of any kind- you are your child's advocate.

PM me if you have any questions. I would be happy to provide more information/support.

 

[jaymie_g]

It is never easy to think about, much less acknowledge and talk about, the fact your child might have a "problem". Many hugs to you! I'm sure you need a few hundred right now.

I don't have exact experience with what you described but I can tell you about my very dear friends son (our children call each other cousins). He is 5 and I had become increasingly concerned that he was exhibiting autistic like tendencies. (I have a degree in Special Ed) She took him for testing, after consultation with our pediatrician, at the local behavioral institute. The psychologist diagnosed him with severe ADHD with some possible visual processing disorders. Come to find out (hey, it's amazing what they've learned in the ummm, lotsssss, of years since I left college) severe ADHD can mirror Aspergers in some cases. He has since started on some medical intervention and we're working on some OT referrals.

That being said, some of the issues you referenced with your child sound autism/aspergerish.....some sound a bit bipolar.....some sound ADHD.

You know YOUR child. If you've got a good peds start there and work forward. If not, contact your local children's hospital (if you've got one). Or, go to the school system. It sounds like your heart is telling you that you need help......your heart is never wrong when it comes to telling you what's best for your child

Remember, your child will always be your child...that will never change. The journey that you both may travel may be different than what you dreamed (and it's okay to mourn the loss of that dream), but you will still be "Mommy" to that precious life.

Good luck.

 

[writersblock42]

I personally would be very very leery of putting any labels such as bipolar on a 6 year old child. ADHD in young children is more severe than older children. He could very well likely grow out of a lot of the symptoms. Even children without any type of disabilities or ADHD have mood swings so it if fair to assume that these mood swings would be more pronounced in a child with ADHD.

 

[4eyedbuzzard]

Seeing a Psychologist can't hurt (although what is done based upon a daignosis or more frighteningly misdiagnosis can). You mentioned your son was almost obsessive with clocks - until he figured out how to tell time. Interesting. Did that particular "obsessive" curiosity then pass? Was it truly obsessive or just annoyingly persistant to adults? Are there other examples of similar behavior? How is his social interaction? There is nothing inherently bad in curiosity, persistance, and even a little obsession. Nor is there anything wrong with being shy, provided it's not "withdrawn." It may lead to some diagnostic label by some, but so what. Lots of successful and happy people have displayed evidence of exactly these traits, and they are often more pronounced in early childhood. Like someone said on another thread recently, "normal" is a setting on a washing machine. Everbody displays behaviors that cause others to wonder at times. The difference between noraml and abnormal, functional and non, etc, is usually one of degree and the ability of the person to control their behavior. 6 year-olds are still learning the control part.

What is his general maturity level for a 6 year old? The tantrums thrown upon being told "no" wouldn't just on their own concern me - as you mentioned, he is persistant. Perhaps he is trying to wear you down. Sounds like he's succeeding. Sorry... The mean streak and mood swings, especially if together would be my greatest concern. Do they come from frustration or being told "no"? He is obviously bright and somewhat obsessed with knowing how his universe functions and probably getting his way(rather normal). If they are just random I would have greater concern.

He might fit the diagnostic criteria for AD/HD, OCD(usually a DX associated with older persons), Aspergers, High Functioning Autism, or others contained in the latest DSM. Who knows at this point? You'll find out, and the more info you have the better. But regardless of any findings, he will remain the same child afterwards. The tough decision is what you do with that diagnosis especially with "borderline" children.

 

[RF536]

We are just starting the process so I am sure this is just one of several evaluations we will have before it is all said and done. With regards to Bi-Polar, that was suggestion by our peds. as a possibility. He said that he attended a seminar on it and it is being diagnosed earlier and earlier, but it is not the same in kids as it is in adults.

While we know that this will not be a quick process, we are hoping to have made some progress before school starts in the fall. It is now starting to interfear with school and his relationships with his peers. We are lucky in that he was in a K-1 class last year, so we will have the same teacher again this year. His teacher has been great working with us and providing feedback and suggestions on things to try. He also provided us with his phone number in case his input was needed over the summer.

We do know that a diagnosis will not change who our son is, at this time I feel that a diagnosis will actually be a relief. At least then we will know what we are dealing with and come up with a game plan. It is a a point that we dread family gatherings because they tend to overwhelm him and trigger meltdowns.

4eyeduzzard - To me he does appear to be immature compared to his classmates, part of it could be the tempertantrums. I would definately say he was obsessed with the clocks until he figured them out. To the point that my mom changed the time on her clock in the basement, because he would run from the upstairs to the basement and watch both clocks chime, if he missed one he would have a fit. If we went anywhere that had clocks, especially ones that chimed, he would have to stay and watch them instead of playing.

 

[BeckyScott]

We do know that a diagnosis will not change who our son is, at this time I feel that a diagnosis will actually be a relief. At least then we will know what we are dealing with and come up with a game plan.

That's how it was with me, too. I just wanted an answer. Now of course, I was hoping for a "cure" to go along with it, which we certainly didn't get. But at least I knew what was happening had a name, and that we weren't alone, and that I wasn't nuts for thinking something was wrong. (everyone else in the family was in serious denial)

My only advice would be for you to find the absolute best place to go for diagnosis, especially this initial one. In our area, it was a large children's hospital a couple hours away, and it took us 6 months to get in. But what they did was an incredibly thorough team evaluation, I believe they were the best qualified in the state, and I have yet to have any other professional even question the diagnosis they gave. (now, our family was a different matter, they still felt they could argue it, whatever) Just the mention of the hospital where his diagnosis was done, nobody questions the accuracy. It cost a fortune, yes. But it was essential to get the services we were entitled to, to have "ammunition" going into IEP meetings, and since it was done by a team I felt confident that it was more accurate than one doctor's opinion.

 

[RF536]

Thanks for all the great information. This was one of our better days, behavior wise. Today we took the kids and went with my parents to Greenfield Village, DS6 had been asking to go there because they have glass blowing. We actually got to watch them pull cane today, very interesting to watch. The cane they made to day will be used later to make glass candy canes with red, white and blue centers. DS6 watched them make 2 complete sets of it. Greenfield Village was right up his alley, lots of hands on things for him to do, and he got to ask a lot of questions not just watch.

 

[RF536]

We met with the therapist today, and apparently we are meeting with the psychologist to see what he recommends, so it is not an ADHD evaluation like I originally thought.

 

[Tigger2252]

Good luck with your upcoming meeting. My dd was diagnosed with severe ADHD when she was 7, and mild Tourette's Syndrome when she was 12. You would see a very big difference between her behavior and your little ones. Where he is fascinated (to obsession almost), with something, nothing will hold her interest for very long. She does "hoard" things, but the neurologist feels that that is more OCD. OCD and Tourette's are fairly common comorbid conditions with ADHD. She is struggling in school, with each grade getting progressively more difficult. This year, she barely passed 7th grade. My nephew has Aspergers and your little one's behavior sounds very similar. My nephew is very smart, and when he becomes interested in something, he is insatiable until he learns everything there is to learn about it. My daughter struggles to read because the number of words on the page overwhelm her. I have gotten a lot of really good information on the web. NIMH is a really good website for all types of disabilities. Their website can be found at www.nimh.nih.gov