"Did Pluto Just Give You A Lap Dance?" 10 days of Naughty & Nice!

[Dizneydawn]

Well if you are reading this than you are in for a real treat...or at least a semi sweet chocolate chip which is not quite real chocolate but makes you feel better about yourself ...kinda like Diet Coke....extra large please cause I am watching my figure...

This trip started over a year ago in anticipation for my son's 18th Birthday!

He loves Christmas lights and Disney and thus...what better place to be...

Then...in October...we had a tragedy in our home...a life altering moment that made this trip a foccus and a needed respit for all involved...and thus...

A slap happy trip ensued on December 4th-15th...with 5 of us the whole time...and a strag-a-long at the end...

We laughed at ourselves...we laughed at others...we laughed at others laughing at ourselves...

There was a good time had by all...and no one was left behind...because Disney does not accept hotel crashers...we asked..they said you need to pay to keep the stay...

We even tried to beg...but they asked us to start acting our age...so we tried a sit-in and handcuffed ourselves to the concierge desk...and then...wouldn't ya know it...the main dude in the Christmas studded vest...pulled out a key that unlocked it...like why would you not have a pink fuzzy handcuff key in your pocket...just sayin....

So forced home were we...and all laughs aside...sad to be gone...wanting to go back..and hoping you enjoy the ride...

If you would like to look back at the longest PTR in the history of life...please do so here...

uh..wait a minute...I need to figure out how I insert a PTR...be back by 2009...

OKAY HERE IS THE LINK FOR THE PTR WITH MANY STORIES MOST SOBER PEOPLE WOULD NOT SHARE!

PTR w/ embarassing stories free of charge

If you want to skip the PTR and just read the funny stories...the links are below (done through page 19)Crush N Gusher Fiaso
2 Chubbies in a race
Rollerbladin with Dumb and Dumber
Is that not your butt?
Exactly how many nipples are you supposed to have?
Ummm...when we left you were wearing shorts!


Up next:
Prelude: Intro of Cast and their Understudies if I don't like them enough!

Cast of Characters - Treyner
Cast of Characters - Carsyn
Cast of Characters - Baylor
Cast of Characters - Dawn & Dan
Day 1 - "Eat Beans if You Need Gas!"
Day 1 - "We Aint Scared of no Po-Po's"
Day 1 - "Disney Wasn't This Far Last Time"
Day 1 - "Can You Just Smell It?"
Day 2 - "Where's the Beach?"
Day 2 - "Boogie Boards are Not Flubber Friendly!"
Day 2 - "My Crack is Better Than Yours!"
***Explained Hiatus***
Day 3 - "Humor at a Fish Fry"
Day 3 - "Fear is Not a Factor!"
Day 3 - "Tampon Tirade!"
Day 3 - "Family and Friends!"
Day 4 - "Were you Born Stupid?"
Day 4 - "No Room in the inn my @ss"
Day 4 - "A Dog That Needs to be Neutered!"
Day 4 - "Would Someone Neuter That Dog!"
Day4/5 - "Welcome to La ShatHole"
Day 5 - "Stop Mounting That Whale"
Day 5 - "A Wookie and a Whale"
Day 5 - "Who Took My Filet Mignon?"
Day 6 - A Change of Plans
Day 7 - Animal Crack is Whack
Day 7 - A Peep Show and a Brat
Part II
PartIII
Day 7 - "Mommy? Why are Those Kids Eating Soap?"

Minnesota Food Report #1
MN Food Report #2

 

[eeyoresnr]

I'm in...we got back last night, but it's going to be a while before I can start my trip report....too much to do and not enough time til Christmas

 

[Dizneydawn]

I'm in...we got back last night, but it's going to be a while before I can start my trip report....too much to do and not enough time til Christmas

Glad you are in...and I have no kids and no Dan tonight...so lonely and have a bit of time...and besides...dusting is overrated!

 

[askelton]

I'm glad you had such a good time. You certainly needed it!

 

[Dizneydawn]

Prelude #1:

The Cast I will start tonight for you but I will only do one because I actually have to work for awhile....shocker I know...

Treyner -

He is my oldest son and turned 18 on this trip...funny kid with an ego the size of Mt. St. Helens around his siblings...but truthfully...very caring and usues his bravado to mask his insecurities...planning on playing college soccer for a D2 school in Colorado next year...and these pics were taken last summer when we visited Colorado for school scouting...

He loves sports, girls and food... not always in that order....and squeezes in school as a neccessity ...

He has never been a kid to cause me any real trouble besides his grades...and that I have decided is his to own at this point...he is not failing and he is a role model to so many not to drink in high school and has friends who call him when they are going to make a bad choice...that whether all A's are on a report card...or not...do not show his value or charachter..

Did I mention he is obsessively competitive...about everything...even underwear...seriously...he needs help...

He is very much an animal guy...loves drawing and making up cartoon voices...when I want to throttle him...he makes me laugh...and as such...probably gets away with murder...but he will be leaving in July...

and this was really a last hurrah with him under our home family wing...next trip he will be an adult on his own already...and I know the dynamics will never be the same as they were on this trip...

- He fell in love with cowboy hats for the first time in Estes Park, Colorado

He is not panning for gold in that bottle...he decided to fill up a bottle with fresh creek water and become a real mountain man...who sleeps in a comfy hotel bed...

Feeding chipmunks peanut butter and trying to convince me that he will not need a rabbies shot and still will give me grandchildren...after they ran through his shorts....

Treyner and I after a 4 hour fun filled, dirt fest, four wheeling ride in the mountains of Colorado. Best day ever! If you notice my face is dirtier than his...it was. It seems mister funny pants finds humor going in front of his mama on his ride and doing his best to kick dirt in my face.

Treyner in goal playing against the MN Thunder pro team! He let 0 goals in!!!

and finally...a senior pic with the cowboy hat...back in Minnesota...new nickname...Treyner Chesney...



I only hope he makes as much money...cause Mama needs a new house...or at least some Coach purses!

Next up: Carsyn...the sister who lived to tell the tale...and usually does!

 

[tinkgurl]

Well I'm hooked.

 

[winkers]

I'm glad you had a great time!

 

[noahdove]

Good start

 

[Dizneydawn]

Well I'm hooked.

Thanks.... Large Mouthed Bass or Sunfish?

I'm glad you had a great time!

We really did...even in the fighting times...cause i brought a taser...

Good start

Thanks and I am glad you are on board...now if you would be helpfull and start some laundry for me...I can get to introducing the rest of the crew....

 

[Dizneydawn]

Prelude #2

Public Announcement:

Please get beverages and snacks and check your bowel tank... as I find it rude to ask me to wait while I type for kitchen or potty breaks....



Okay...who do we have left...oh yeah...

Carsyn...

Having blueberries forced on her at Prime Time in 2006...

Carsyn and Treyner's friend Dan from Michigan this past summer...they play soccer together in the summer (Treyner and Dan) and Carsyn has learned that any boy who is a friend of Treyner's will never be allowed to be more than a friend to Carsyn...much to her chagrin...Cause there is something to having a big brother who threatens bodily injury that scares them away...

And Carsyn this fall...when she tried dark hair...for 3 months..only to go back to blond again...I mean where would she get the idea it is fun to change hair color?

A bit about Carsyn...

This was her 2 weeks before her 13th birthday! Yes she always has looked older than I would have liked.

She just turned 15...the last of her grade...and I am reminded daily that most of her friends have their liscenses already..and she just got her permit...I offered to hold her back so she could be the oldest...cause I am a giver..but she thought I was being a smart mouth...the audacity!

She is very caring and at the same time...very committed to standing up for herself if she thinks she is getting the short end of the stick..which is about 99% of the time...

She loves harder than anyone I know and is very mature about friends and relationships...

we have gotten a great relationship going now...after a few rough patches...and she tells me everything...

I had 2 sisters...she has 2 brothers...

so I cannot understand what she has to put up with boys being in her business and feeling odd man out...but I tell her she does not have to worry about someone stealing her clothes...but now that I think about it..she is missing several thongs...hmmmm...

She loves soccer and friends but most of all worries about everything...and tries to please everyone first...which I have taught her...and am trying to undo...

Carsyn is really a fun spirit...and I am glad she is mine...she took lots of pics this trip...and wants credit...and payment rights...

Up next....Baylor...12 1/2 years old and witty...with the humor of Red Fox...and Richard Pryor...much to the dismay of his school and teachers...

 

[tinkgurl]

Thanks.... Large Mouthed Bass or Sunfish?

B-B-B-BASS ....

 

[Dizneydawn]

B-B-B-BASS ....

Ohhhh...I figured you would say..."STARFISH"

Thanks a lot for joining the nut house!

 

[Dizneydawn]

Prelude # 3

Then there was 3...and for that I am greatfull.

You see on the afternoon of Halloween this year...my youngest son was at a friend's house...A verrrrrry long story short....the mom left for work...which I had been told she would be home..and the 3 12/13 year old boys were left alone. Not a great idea...and they went down to the remains of the bonfire from the night before.

The boy whose home it had been...went back to the house to use the restroom...came down with a glass of what Baylor thought was water.

It ended up being gasoline...

He threw it on the embers...it flashed back on him...and when that happened...got scared and threw the rest of the gas in the cup away from him...unfortunatley...it went all over Baylor's left leg. The flame followed the gas.

Baylor had his witts about him...when patting it out and rolling it out did not work...he jumped into a pool that was not drained yet and saved his life.

Baylor ended up with 3rd degree burns on his left leg from top of the foot to mid shin and on the back of his ankle...

Skin grafting and basically being in the hospital for the month of November or at home on bedrest...meant that the trip was very up in the air. Huge emotional hit to the family as well as financially. I can tell you that it is the hardest thing I will or ever had to go through. The burn unit docs and nurses were fantastic...we have the best in the country right here 30 minutes from him and I know how many times people there did not make it through recovery. It was heart wrenching to be greatfull that your child was not as bad as others...that yes he will be scarred...but he will live...and knowing others were not as lucky.

I spoke to the doctors immediatley about the trip...looking at his raw leg and wondering if he would ever walk let alone be able to go...he would be missing so much school....should he miss more?

The doctors though...convinced me that the trip would be great for him...needed in fact...and that was hard to hear from a practical standpoint. Yet the depression rate is high for injuries like this and he needed to just be a kid...so what better place than Disney for that?

So we went...and we had a great time...and as I write this I will be giving you the updates as we go on how his progress was...but it was the right choice...the best for our family...and the best for Baylor.

He is a guy who is a total boy...he usually is playing hockey now and snowboarding and outside 24/7 if he could. It is hard to watch him watch his friends...because he is not strong enough yet...not back 100% and will not be for a year at least.

He loves animals.

He loves Chris Farley and all things that make him laugh. He told our pastor he wants to be on Comedy Central when he grows up...and the old me might have pointed out all the impractacalities in that wish...but the new me says...go for it.

He is super funny...totally to my demise when I want to be firm...and is more mature than the older two, many times. He gets the fact of just doing your chore and it is over...that arguing only perpetuates the time...he thinks bickering is pointless...and when the feuding fades between anyone...listen for him...cause he usually has a one liner that makes everyone laugh and forget what they were mad about in the first place.

Here are some pics of Baylor...I know I wrote a lot about him...but this trip ended up being one for him to become alive again...and his brother and sister really did a great job of making him feel like his old self...even if that meant handing down a wedgie!

Baylor and his soccer jersey in Spring of 2008


Baylor and his cousin Skyler at her 1st Birthday end of October

Baylor and his pumpkin...2 days before Halloween...

One of my favorite of Baylor from August 2006 - we were at a dance at Disney for Grand Gatherings (Carsyn is in the background)

Next up...the 2 adults on this extravaganza...who act more like kids than the kids!

 

[happybratpack]

Love it! Can't wait to hear more...your kids are beautiful.

 

[Dizneydawn]

Love it! Can't wait to hear more...your kids are beautiful.

Thanks so much...I only wish I had been that cute as a kid versus living life with coke bottle glasses and crooked teeth cause parents are tight wads and "who needs to eat like a regular person...chew on the side of your mouth."

Ahemm...counseling session 104 and 105...in progress...

Seriously...they are pretty cute in my eyes...and Baylor just got asked to a dance at school by a girl who is just a doll...and for that..I am doing the happy dance... cause he was all worried that no one was going to like him with his injury...that he would "gross" them out...and I told him...they will be so grossed out by his burping/farting friends...that he will come accross as Prince Charming...no matter scar or not...that he needed to come up with a great story of his injury like he was a secret child spy for the CIA and he saved an entire Polish family from a car bomb while they vacationed in Siberia and all he has to show for it is his leg...ehhhh...no biggie....

He laughed and laughed and it may have been the morphine coma he was in at the time...but I am taking full credit that I am funny!

 

[OhioDisneyLover]

I'm in. Waiting for more.

 

[Dizneydawn]

I'm in. Waiting for more.

Thank you for joining this group of people...ready for adventure...and much laughs...I hope!

 

[MEK]

Wow - great start! Congrats to your oldest son for his furture college soccer career. Congrats to your daughter for putting her hair back to its proper color. And a special "three cheers" to your youngest son for enduring such an emtionally and physically painful experience. I wish him much success on his continued recovery. And ....I am looking forward to reading your trip report.

P.S. I have two boys (14 and 16) who have been playing club soccer since 3rd grade. Any tips you have for college would be greatly appreciated. The oldest is just starting the college showcases as a sophmore and will participate in an ODP (olympic dev) program this spring/summer.

 

[Dizneydawn]

Wow - great start! Congrats to your oldest son for his furture college soccer career. Congrats to your daughter for putting her hair back to its proper color. And a special "three cheers" to your youngest son for enduring such an emtionally and physically painful experience. I wish him much success on his continued recovery. And ....I am looking forward to reading your trip report.

P.S. I have two boys (14 and 16) who have been playing club soccer since 3rd grade. Any tips you have for college would be greatly appreciated. The oldest is just starting the college showcases as a sophmore and will participate in an ODP (olympic dev) program this spring/summer.

WARNING!
Long soccer rant ahead..please only read if you care about soccer...
Hi! Tips on soccer...well I did things completely backwards and some things should have been done better maybe...

#1 Treyner has been a gifted athelete since in utero...(seriously - he did a flip 2 weeks over do and breech...the night before my scheduled c-section...doctor said "no way..he is too big to turn at this point"...I said..."well I am telling you I looked like an alien was coming out of me"...and I was right... ) so he was in gymanstics, dance, basketball, hockey, football and soccer since 3. He thought he was going to play football in college - not soccer...so always played club in the summer and football in HS. Much the the dismay of the HS coach.

The summer after his freshman year...he was headhunted by a better team from a town 40 miles away...and he was at a point that he was serious about socer and his town team was not...so he started that winter playing indoor in the winter and throughout spring and summer for a team that was awesome. Played with them for 2 years..developed skills as a goalie he needed - he had never really been coached before...his Dad was his coach and he had never seen soccer until Treyner played...

#2 This past spring he was at the MN state cup play in tournament...and their team played a team called "Bangu" which is an elite team...compromised of the best of the state of MN...they only play tournaments...and were expected to get spanked...they usually creamed people 15-0. Treyner held them 0-0.

The calls started coming in...All the local colleges wanted to know who he was...they never saw him before...did not have him on their radar at all...and we started saying..."Treyner...this is a for sure...football is a maybe."

We met with many local colleges...but MN does not have any higher than division 3 right now...and that means no athletic scholarships. Great extremely competitive teams...the best in the state has literally came to 20 of his games....and one coach was honest with me. He asked if Treyner wants to play past college.

I was shell shocked...here was a coach who wanted to recruit my son saying that if Treyner has interest past college...he needs to leave MN.

2 weeks later we were on a plane heading for Colorado. Looking for a school with a good coach and graphic arts....with no video footage...no help...just flailing as a mom for her son.

#3 I called a few colleges (they have 8 division 2 schools) and we matched his needs with 3. I emailed the coaches...attached the e-mails of accolades he had received from the local colleges...and asked for them to meet with us. This mind you was the middle of June....and by the grace of God the 2 coaches he was interested in the most...e-mailed back with their phone numbers. One guys was a total jack wad..condescending and acted like I should kisshis tukkus over the phone...I told Treyner I di not want him playig for a coach who behaved like that.

Second coach...super nice and asked if we couldmeet the next day. In Durango. 6 hour drive from Denver. I said...sure! Had done research...he had coached the pros...colleges...and internationally...and when we met...the first question he asked Treyner was...

"Who is your favorite goalie?"

Treyner just stared at him...and he said..."Son...if you do not know who you like how can you know when you are as good as him or even better surpass his skills?"

Fell in love with him right there.

He had Treyner play with the main goalie that night and a assistant coach who tried out for the Galaxy and had been accepted at Dallas...he "checked" the grass conditions...since he could not actively recruit him in season...and asked us to come back the next day again....so we stayed...and he met with us...and said he thought Treyner had good potential. Asked him to come to their camp in 5 weeks... (ummm...I have to come up with $500 and a plane ticket right after we get back???) and he would give him his answer then...

Treyner went...missed the first of state playoffs but his loyalty needed to be to himself at that point...received goalie of the camp award...and he went back out again over Halloween for 5 days..saw 2 games and decided that this was a great fit. They want him...he worships them...and since...he has grown 2 more inches...6'3 and about 186 right now...

But I tell you that it is hard...I could write and write...I just went on advocating for my child and felt my way through it. He has since been asked to play for the new "Bangu team" which is now called "MN Thunder Academy" ran with the help of our MN pro team. He is now the starting goalie for that team he tied 0-0 only 5 months ago....He forgo his senior football season to play soccer for our HS team that was horible...but getting shot on 15-25 times in a game is good practice...and he has a devotiion like nothing else. They like the fact he has not played hard core before now...he has not been programmed with so many coaching styles that he cannot learn...that he has never had a goalie coach so he has not peaked yet...and that he is a versitile player and flexible...with his gymnastics background he can do a front handspring throw-in...and he can punt the ball from the top of the box to his opponents box...almost scored goals 3 times this year ...

He has had some full rides offered to him from smaller NAIA schools...but if he wants bigger than college...that will not help him...and he can always play down if things do not work out in Colorado. But he will always wonder what if...if he doesn't pursue it now.

Things I wish I knew....invest in a very good video camera...high speed footage and do not ape him/her specifically...coaches want a field shot to see them interact on the field...how they intercept the ball..read the field...

do not think you know what coaches are looking at either...when Treyner was getting shot on by the 2 older guys...I was wanting to hide...he was getting smoked...but the coach loved it...he said...he is doing fin..he will never stop them right now...he has not had the training...but his arms are outstetched...he is attacking the ball..and he has great vertical and horizontal lines...??? I was like...okay...but he got scored on 600 times in 3 minutes!

Treyner would probably do a great job talking to them...he would not moind at all...and he would give good info from aplayer point of view...pm. me your info if you want him to call them.

Okay...enough soccer talk....back to your regularly scheduled program...

 

[MEK]

WARNING!
Long soccer rant ahead..please only read if you care about soccer...
Hi! Tips on soccer...well I did things completely backwards and some things should have been done better maybe...

Things I wish I knew....invest in a very good video camera...high speed footage and do not ape him/her specifically...coaches want a field shot to see them interact on the field...how they intercept the ball..read the field...


Okay...enough soccer talk....back to your regularly scheduled program...

Dizneydawn-

Thanks for the interesting reply. Your son sounds like he's a natural talent. Goalie, too! Cool. Sounds like he is well on his way to a successful career.

I like your idea about the video camera - never thought about that. My eldest son is a field player. Loves midfield, but is fortunate enough to be able to play forward and defense. So he's a good utility player. Played defense in the high school state tournament when the usual right defender got suspended from the team for taking someone's ADHD med. It was definately a shining moment for my son when he had to step in and play two complete games from start to finish in a position he doesn't normally play. For a small state, our high school teams are pretty competitive. He got a lot of positive feedback from the coaches, so I am hoping that his off season and junior year are successful.