Prayers for Mom * Dad (now) * - Update Post #97
- Thread starter Tiggerholic
- Start date
Hey there my friend how are you doing< Saw this getting lossed in the numerous threads. But you have not been lost in my thoughts and prayers.
I can understand if you do not want to post. I just wanted you to know we are praying for you and all your family.
I can understand if you do not want to post. I just wanted you to know we are praying for you and all your family.
disvaclub92
Always dreaming about Disney
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2000
Sending prayers and hugs to you and your family.
iamabigdisfan
Earning My Ears
- Joined
- Oct 20, 2007
Hey Tigger,
It's Dis here. Sorry to hear what you are going through. My Prayers are with you.
It's Dis here. Sorry to hear what you are going through. My Prayers are with you.
Disney Dreams
Proudly afflicted with TDMA!
- Joined
- Mar 10, 2006
Thinking about you out there Tigger. If you want / need to talk, you know how to find me. Feel free. 
Does anyone have Lynn telephone number this is a long time away. I am worried that her own medical condition is not good. I am sure if her mom did not make it or is so so ill she would let us know.
If you are reading this we miss you
If you are reading this we miss you
disvaclub92
Always dreaming about Disney
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2000
Unfortunately no Belle. Sending hugs Tigger!!
Tiggerholic
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2006
I want to first apologize for my lack of postings, but they had to move me to another room and my fellow roommate was constantly getting phone calls, so I could not use my laptop at all. I missed out on so much Halloween stuff it is not even funny 
Okay so let me get everyone caught up to speed:
I was finally released late Wednesday evening, after a little false alarm. My intestines had started working again, but as soon as they allowed me to eat regular food, they started shutting down again. With much persistence on my part, the Dr. did allow me to go home
I was barely home 24hrs and I was back in the ER because pus was coming out of the site where they had inserted the PICC line. So there I was, trapped in the ER, for almost 24hrs, getting IV antibiotics. It felt FANTASTIC to finally be home, but it killed me to leave my mother lying in ICU, still in a coma 
This is where it all gets very emotional and complicated.
** Let me just say that my mom has an advance directive that clearly states that she would NOT want ANY of the things that are being done to her, to prolong her life, but my dad has the final say **
On the 23rd they started weaning her off the seizure medication, Ativant, and
began to give her Dilantin, to control the seizures and get her out of the coma. On the 25th, we were told that she was paralyzed on her left side, it was HIGHLY doubtful that she would regain consciousness and even if she did, she would have to be "institutionalized" because she would never be able to breath on her own, and her "mental state" would be that of almost vegetative.
On this past Saturday, Dad and I went in to see Mom to basically say our "goodbyes" and we walk in and her eyes are open
I am thinking it is a miracle and I am not going to lose my Mom after all 
However, the Dr advised us that she had aspirated her own vomit and was having a harder time with her lungs and she was not following commands. I kind of chalked the non-command deal to her *just* coming out of the coma, but after I went in today, Sunday, and sat with her for almost 2 hrs, I knew she was not understanding anything I was saying. She would look directly at me when I talked to her, but it was like she was looking right through me. The Dr did come in while I was there and reiterated that Mom was NEVER going to be Mom again.
So I headed on home and stopped by to let Dad know how Mom was doing and really talked to him about how the decisions he was making were going against Mom's *wishes* to die with dignity. I totally understand my Dad's unwillingness to let go, as they have been married 56 years. We came to the conclusion that we will talk with *her private* Neurologist tomorrow and get HER opinion, rather than a "hospitalist" who does not know my Mom at all. If she says the same thing that the Drs have been telling us, then we will let Mom go home to God.
I just ask that you keep my Mom, Beverly, in your thoughts and prayers and help us to make the right decision that is best for her.
With
and
Lyn
Okay so let me get everyone caught up to speed:I was finally released late Wednesday evening, after a little false alarm. My intestines had started working again, but as soon as they allowed me to eat regular food, they started shutting down again. With much persistence on my part, the Dr. did allow me to go home
I was barely home 24hrs and I was back in the ER because pus was coming out of the site where they had inserted the PICC line. So there I was, trapped in the ER, for almost 24hrs, getting IV antibiotics. It felt FANTASTIC to finally be home, but it killed me to leave my mother lying in ICU, still in a coma This is where it all gets very emotional and complicated.
** Let me just say that my mom has an advance directive that clearly states that she would NOT want ANY of the things that are being done to her, to prolong her life, but my dad has the final say **
On the 23rd they started weaning her off the seizure medication, Ativant, and
began to give her Dilantin, to control the seizures and get her out of the coma. On the 25th, we were told that she was paralyzed on her left side, it was HIGHLY doubtful that she would regain consciousness and even if she did, she would have to be "institutionalized" because she would never be able to breath on her own, and her "mental state" would be that of almost vegetative.
On this past Saturday, Dad and I went in to see Mom to basically say our "goodbyes" and we walk in and her eyes are open
I am thinking it is a miracle and I am not going to lose my Mom after all However, the Dr advised us that she had aspirated her own vomit and was having a harder time with her lungs and she was not following commands. I kind of chalked the non-command deal to her *just* coming out of the coma, but after I went in today, Sunday, and sat with her for almost 2 hrs, I knew she was not understanding anything I was saying. She would look directly at me when I talked to her, but it was like she was looking right through me. The Dr did come in while I was there and reiterated that Mom was NEVER going to be Mom again. So I headed on home and stopped by to let Dad know how Mom was doing and really talked to him about how the decisions he was making were going against Mom's *wishes* to die with dignity. I totally understand my Dad's unwillingness to let go, as they have been married 56 years. We came to the conclusion that we will talk with *her private* Neurologist tomorrow and get HER opinion, rather than a "hospitalist" who does not know my Mom at all. If she says the same thing that the Drs have been telling us, then we will let Mom go home to God.
I just ask that you keep my Mom, Beverly, in your thoughts and prayers and help us to make the right decision that is best for her.
With
and Lyn
disvaclub92
Always dreaming about Disney
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2000
Lynn, hugs to you and your family. My prayers are with you during this time. Thanks for the update.
Tiggerholic
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2006
I am so sorry for not thanking everyone for their thoughts, prayers, pixie dust, words of encouragement, love and hugs ... I promise I will keep everyone updated now that I am home and do not have to worry if I am stopping a phone call from coming in or going out 
and
Lyn
and Lyn
Tiggerholic
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2006
I am not sure how many of you are familiar with the singer Natalie Merchant, but I wanted to share the lyrics to a song that I shared with my father earlier today.
You were the love
For certain of my life
You were simply my beloved wife
I don't know for certain
How I'll live my life
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
I can't believe
I've lost the very best of me
You were the love
For certain of my life
You were simply my beloved wife
I don't know for certain
How I'll live my life
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
I can't believe
I've lost the very best of me
You were the love
For certain of my life
For fifty years simply me beloved wife
With another love I'll never lie again
It's you I can't deny
It's you I can't defy
A depth so deep into my grief
Without my beloved soul
I renounce my life
As my right
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
My beloved wife
My love is gone she suffered long
In hours of pain
My love is gone
Now my suffering begins
My love is gone
Would it be wrong if I should
Surrender all the joy in my life
Go with her tonight?
My love is gone she suffered long
In hours of pain
My love is gone
Would it be wrong if I should
Just turn my face away from the light
Go with her tonight?
You were the love
For certain of my life
You were simply my beloved wife
I don't know for certain
How I'll live my life
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
I can't believe
I've lost the very best of me
You were the love
For certain of my life
You were simply my beloved wife
I don't know for certain
How I'll live my life
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
I can't believe
I've lost the very best of me
You were the love
For certain of my life
For fifty years simply me beloved wife
With another love I'll never lie again
It's you I can't deny
It's you I can't defy
A depth so deep into my grief
Without my beloved soul
I renounce my life
As my right
Now alone without my beloved wife
My beloved wife
My beloved wife
My love is gone she suffered long
In hours of pain
My love is gone
Now my suffering begins
My love is gone
Would it be wrong if I should
Surrender all the joy in my life
Go with her tonight?
My love is gone she suffered long
In hours of pain
My love is gone
Would it be wrong if I should
Just turn my face away from the light
Go with her tonight?
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