How Do You Get a Baby to Sleep in a Crib?

[cgcw]

I can really feel for what you are going through. It was one of the toughest things I ever had to do. I know it's very hard to walk away from your crying child. I've been there, done that, and squished the habit the second time before it got out of hand.

What I did for a while with DS8 was put the baby down, set the timer on the microwave for a couple of minutes and walk as far away as possible. I'd try having music on for me to try to cover up the cry from the baby. It never did make me not hear him, but it certainly masked the sound a bit. This is more for you than for the baby. I also had it suggested to me to play classical music for the baby to sooth him to sleep.

It's going to be a tough couple of nights (and nap times if your home with him) but quickly you'll see that he doesn't cry as long or as hard as he did the night before. Good luck.

 

[becka]

We had trouble getting DS to sleep in his crib from about 2 weeks to 10 weeks. We finally had some success by putting a nice cozy blanket over the crib sheet (we still use this) and putting him in there when he was drowzy but not quite asleep.

DS started waking up at night more when he was getting that first tooth so I understand your pain with that. I would make sure to give DS Infant Ibuprofen right before bed and Orajel does make a nighttime formula that is stronger and longer lasting than the regular formula.

Just a few weeks ago (after he had been sick as well) we had several nights of him not wanting to go to sleep. We soon discovered that he can outlast us! It took a few nights but I would let him cry for 2-3 minutes and then go check up on him, readjust his covers, turn his aquariam back on, pat his little head, etc. and then leave again. It was sooooo hard but thankfully he learned again quickly.

 

[Spinning]

My DD was the same way and we did everything you have tried and then some. Including buying a loud key wound clock, sleepign with on of her blankets and then putting it in her bed. She wasn't a sleeper from the time she was born. She started out in a cradle in our room. Never in our bed. Even then I rember she wsn't a quiet sleeper or solid. We then moved the craddle to the hall, then her room. We never brought her in our bed. We just rocked her sang to her and then We did the ferber method it was horrible and didn't work. We did it for a week straight, DH and I would fight we got less sleep Horrible! We got a clock and set it for the time they said and would just stare at the clock then go in pat her and tell her it was night night and on it went.....Guess we could have continued but I was more tired and it wasn't working.
Also make sure the baby is getting enough rest during the day! That was a huge problem with DD she really never slept and the only way she napped during the day was in the car seat, swing or stroller. So I start working on naps making sure she sleeping during the day in her bed . Also routine...bath, bottle and then the magic for DD.... we started reading the same bed time story. I read it at nap time, and then again at bed. It worked like magic. I could say it in my sleep!
Now DD is a wonderful sleeper. Goes to bed with no problems. She still will occassionally nap, she is now 7! LOL! I guess she is making up for all the sleep she lost!
Sleep issues are so hard to deal with.
Anyway this is what I have learned with the second one....Personality is a big factor. DS great sleeper! I did nothing different he just slept! ALL THE TIME! but wouldn't sleep in the car seat, stroller and HATED the swing! So kids are different. I hope if the baby is taking a nap during the day you are catching a few winks too! Good luck!

 

[peg2001]

I don't want to offend anyone here who has given advice that has worked for them but I did want to offer an opposing view:

If it feels wrong to let your baby cry, DON'T DO IT!! If you haven't already, try reading some books by Dr. William Sears. He doesn't believe in the "cry it out" method but rather encourages what he calls "night parenting." Your child does not stop needing you just because the sun has gone down. It tears me up inside to hear so many stories of parents just letting their child cry because "it works." It works because the child finally gives up, discouraged and alone.

I nursed and rocked my babies to sleep every night, and throughout the night when they awakened. I did this for 9-months with the first and for 1-year with the second. After that, when they weaned, I started a very set routine to get them ready for bed, including bath, brush teeth, pajamas, reading stories, rocking and singing. I just put them to bed SLIGHTLY more awake than they were the night before. Try including a "lovey" either a blanket or stuffed anmial into your routine for the baby to attach to. Rock with it and put it into the crib each night. This helps them transition into being alone.

The most important thing is to do what feels right to you. I know that it is tough to not get enough sleep. I've been there. But now my kids are 6 and 3 and sleep GREAT! There is absolutely no fight to put them to bed and they only call out if they wake up sick.

Peggy

 

[mtemm]

I think everyone needs to find what works for them and their family.

As for crying being cruel, well, my son cries if he can't get the remote or play with the gas fireplace that we have. For a while he cried because he hated to be in his car seat when we went out. I comforted him, but I didn't give in. I believe the same thing about sleep...maybe he wants to hang with mommy, but he needs his sleep. I will say that Healthy Sleep Habits does concentrate on sleep cues your baby gives, so should keep crying to a minimum in those first few days.

There is a book that a friend of mine loved called the No Cry Sleep Solution that might be a better fit if you just are again crying at all. I believe that whatever you choose consitency is key. Give it time before you decide to try something new

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/t...002-0164601-7747225?v=glance&s=books&n=507846

 

[MerryPoppins]

I had worked in a preschool for years before having children. Part of that time I worked with toddlers. I had a lot of practice getting little ones down for naps, so I just used the same method we had used at work.

I would get my kids ready for bed and cuddle them for a while. Then I would get them settled into the crib and sit down on the floor by the crib with my arm through the slats. I'd sing while I rubbed or patted. You find out pretty quickly what is soothing to your child - then stick with that one.

Once they were asleep, I'd turn the radio on low for background noise. It also seemed to help them if they woke up to have soft music playing. I think they felt less alone. If they called me by crying in the night, I would feed them if needed, change a diaper, cuddle and pat. It worked like a charm for me.

I'm sure I couldn't stand the crying either. I know it works for some people, but I'd be a nervous wreck. I know this is more time consuming, but I found that they seldom needed my reassurance for long. After they were past needing middle of the night feedings, they wouldn't get me up - so you know that they put themselves back to sleep.

We changed the pattern as they got older, too. It included bath, teeth, cuddle and read, bedtime rituals like arranging stuffed animals and kisses goodnight, then I'd sing and pat or rub for a song or two. I didn't stay until they went to sleep at that point. DD loved a tape that I bought. She listened to it for years as she went to sleep. I'd be glad to share the name if anyone is interested. She sometimes still listens to a relaxation tape while she settles down for the night and she's 11. LOL!

I would encourage you to go with what you think you can stick with. You know your child best. If you'd rather have "easy" bedtimes, you'll probably have to let him cry. If you are willing to put a little more time into each night and your schedule can handle that, then there are other options without letting your baby walk all over you. Just remember that you are the parent and you need to be in control of the situation. Good luck.

 

[Princess_Aurora]

peg2001, thank you for that opposing view. We've been trying the CIO method for three nights now with no luck. I always have to put him in bed with us. It would be different if it was just my sleep he was disturbing, but it keeps my DD awake and DH awake through the night as well. DH and I have to wake up at 5 a.m. to get to school/work in the mornings so it's very hard to stay up all night. Last night I was sooooo determined to make it work after hearing everyone's advice and we were up until 12:30 and he still hadn't fallen asleep and I was about to become a walking zombie!

I'm beginning to think now that it must be the crib. Even when he's alone in our bed he can sleep just fine there by himself. Maybe we do need to add some padding on the matress. Maybe a CD player in his room playing some classical music will help too. I just don't think crying it out works for him/us.

 

[becka]

PA - Do you think he is afraid of the crib or just uncomfortable?

Early on with DS we tried to get him used to the crib in very short doses even if he was not sleeping in it just in case it was just a fear of being in the crib. It probably goes against all theories but I would put some toys in there and stand over the crib for maybe 5 minutes at a time and play with him just so he had spent some time in the crib even if it was time when I was not trying to get him to sleep. I did this for a couple of days. I don't know if it worked or not but we were successfully able to get him to sleep there about a week later.

After that we ended up trying to make him more comfortable. Comfy blanket over the sheets, added the aquarium thing for music, put him in sideways with a rolled up blanket by his side to make it seem smaller, etc.

 

[Princess_Aurora]

No, he's not afraid of his crib...he can actually play in there for quite a while.

 

[SonjaB]

PA, jfulcer, Snoops, and the others are so right. Dr. Ferber's method works and causes no harm to the child. They are not abandoned, they are learning. They have to learn they are okay by themselves and cannot have authority over mommy and daddy's sleep. Give it a try, I think you'll have good results inside a week. I know it's hard, BELIEVE me, I know. But in the long run, you'll be glad you did.

 

[Spinning]

P.A. What is his sleep habits during the day? That was the problem with my DD. She wasn't gettting enough sleep during the day. Sounds crazy but when we really worked on day time sleep the night time fell into place. Plus I wasn't so tired or as easily frustrated during the day and I could pat her back.
I wouldn't use the crib for anything other than sleep. If you need a safe place for the baby use a portacrib.

 

[mum4jenn]

My dd slept in her crib from the very day we brought her home from the hospital. I was so tired I was afraid of rolling on her when I was asleep so she was always in the crib and we never had a problem. Sorry... I know that was not any help!!

 

[Claudia1]

Just a couple of thoughts..........

1) Does he sleep in a slightly different position? Maybe turned slightly?

2) Would it help to use one of your sheets or somethings else with the "scent" of your bed in his crib? If he sleeps there without you, then maybe something familiar would help. Any familiar noises in your room that are absent from his? (Does Daddy snore? Maybe tape it and play it..... HaHa!)

When our DGD was born, I insisted that my DD put her in her crib from the first night. A bassinet during the day and her crib at night. (We are helping her to raise her baby, so she listens to me!) For the first week, she kept waking up and seemed to hate her crib. She definitely knew that it was different. We replaced the sheets with some of identical material, used the rolled blanket for a smaller space (I know that yours is too old for that), and concentrated on making it the "same". It worked and she sleeps in her crib without any more problems. We also used a "heartbeat" bear. That may be more of a newborn aid but it also helped.

One more thing..... I agree that the temperature could be an issue.

 

[peg2001]

Originally posted by Princess_Aurora
peg2001, thank you for that opposing view. We've been trying the CIO method for three nights now with no luck. I always have to put him in bed with us. It would be different if it was just my sleep he was disturbing, but it keeps my DD awake and DH awake through the night as well. I just don't think crying it out works for him/us.

I think you are answering your own problem! Do what works for your family and feels right to you. Does everyone sleep well with the baby in your bed? If so, that is what is working for you! When your baby becomes a toddler and you are ready to get him out of your bed, you can either try putting him to sleep with your DD so he is still not alone, or move him to a pallet near your bed as a transition to sleeping by himself.

I know it seems hard right now but they are so little for such a short period of time. I promise that he won't still be insisting to sleep with mommy and daddy by the time he goes off to college.

Peggy

 

[crazyme5kids]

I am an opposing view person too! I say if it doesn't bother you or your husband do what makes you and your baby happy. My 17 and 14 year olds stopped sleeping with us a long time ago, and the 10 and 4 year old only come in when they are really sick or very scared. Now my 22 month old is still held to fall asleep, and when she wakes up I pick her up and cuddle with her until she falls back to sleep. It is a time I enjoy and treasure, she is content, and it won't be forever.