WWYD? Neighbor smoking weed

[Lilacs4Me]

dup

 

[Lilacs4Me]

I stand with the mind your own business folks.

It's part of living close to someone. Whether it's them smoking weed, using foul language, up all night making noise, it comes with close living. I'd much rather be a neighbor that keeps my thoughts to myself. If it's an issue with your DD then YOU make a change. You don't want the smell, close the window. It's not like he's smoking 24/7 and if he is well, dang, that must be one happy hippie

The way things are going it may be legal in your state before you know it.......

haha, he seems pretty happy most of the time!

A few clarifications overall (not just for your post):

It's not legal in our state - yet - and I highly doubt he has an issue where he needs it medicinally, but you know, hidden disabilities and all that...

We aren't calling the police! I don't want to ruin the guys life, I just want to figure out the best way to keep the smell out of our house/DD's bedroom specifically. She won't agree to keeping her window closed, but a fan might do the trick.

We HAVE known he smokes - we all walk past his garage every day! I don't care that he does - he never bothers us, even when he has his buddies out there around the firepit - I just didn't know how much it was coming in the window of that bedroom until this past weekend. And of course the teens don't care, what teen would? Yes, they think it's funny to tell their friends the story. I however, do not think it's so funny. I don't care that he does it, but I don't do it, and don't want it coming into my windows!

And yes, close living stinks (literally!) sometimes! 5 years and counting until youngest DS13 graduates HS, and we are going back to our acre-wide lots!

I'm not afraid the dad would "go off" on me...he isn't that type. He is very nice, and even though I don't know him well, I do have a good friend that worked with him for years - he is retired now, but was a botanist for our town's largest attraction. She has never said anything bad about him.

Thank you to everyone who responded! I think DH will casually just tell him that it seems to waft into that particular bedroom window (they have the same house footprint as we do), and leave it at that. If they do something about it, great, if not...we have 5 years left and we'll buy a big fan.

Thanks!

 

[SRQ57]

I'm not quite sure what you should do, but it brings to mind a funny story.
A while back a neighbor lady happened to mention to me one day that she could smell weed in the early morning hours near her front entry. It was implied because we had our young twenty something living at home at the time that it was him and she could smell it.
Naturally, the following day I mentioned this to my son. He started laughing HYSTERICALLY. Very annoyed, I'm asking him"what's so funny?". Through his laughter, he looks at my husband, (who appeared to be in on the joke). Finally through his laughter he manages to get out "It's HER HUSBAND", he's out there smoking weed in the middle of the night!".
My son had seen him a few times when he would come in late. My husband had seen him as well, because he would leave for work around 5 am at that time.
I never did tell her who it was. She never brought it up again, so I assume the hubby fessed up. LOL!

 

[Lilacs4Me]

I'm not quite sure what you should do, but it brings to mind a funny story.
A while back a neighbor lady happened to mention to me one day that she could smell weed in the early morning hours near her front entry. It was implied because we had our young twenty something living at home at the time that it was him and she could smell it.
Naturally, the following day I mentioned this to my son. He started laughing HYSTERICALLY. Very annoyed, I'm asking him"what's so funny?". Through his laughter, he looks at my husband, (who appeared to be in on the joke). Finally through his laughter he manages to get out "It's HER HUSBAND", he's out there smoking weed in the middle of the night!".
My son had seen him a few times when he would come in late. My husband had seen him as well, because he would leave for work around 5 am at that time.
I never did tell her who it was. She never brought it up again, so I assume the hubby fessed up. LOL!

 

[Ephany]

Another neighbor and pot story. A few weeks ago I came home after dark and it really smelled like skunk when I got out of the car. So much so, that when DH came out to greet me, I asked him if he could smell it too. Neither one of us has ever smoked pot and I honestly wouldn't recognize the odor. A few days later my neighbor flagged me down and awkwardly kept chatting about random stuff before every so casually mentioning that she uses it for pain control (it's not legal here, but no judgement) and DH and I were welcome to partake if she was on the porch. I *think* she must have been out that night and heard me ask him about the skunk smell. I was totally taken aback and told her no big deal, just please don't offer it to my 16 year old. I'd never dream of calling the cops but I found the whole thing rather funny.

 

[barkley]

Neither one of us has ever smoked pot and I honestly wouldn't recognize the odor

i had a brother who partook extensively and tried to use the (then) popular cover up scent of patchouli for decades my mom thought weed smelled like patchouli and always assumed anyone who smelled like patchouli was a 'reefer junkie' thank goodness the essential oil crazy came along after she passed away-otherwise she would be giving judgmental glares at sahm's at the grocery store

 

[luvnwdwgal]

Hope everything works out for you. From what you say your neighbor seems like an ok guy. It’s the stoner son and his friends that would concern me so that’s why I prob

i had a brother who partook extensively and tried to use the (then) popular cover up scent of patchouli for decades my mom thought weed smelled like patchouli and always assumed anyone who smelled like patchouli was a 'reefer junkie' thank goodness the essential oil crazy came along after she passed away-otherwise she would be giving judgmental glares at sahm's at the grocery store

I’d rather smell weed any day over patchouli. That scent is awful!

 

[LongLiveRafiki]

Ugh no. Do not call the police on a neighbor for doing something legal on their property (and it would be unfathomable that a regular smoker wouldn’t do the bare minimum to get their card and be legal). There is nothing the police can do to stop smells from wafting over property lines. However calling police on a neighbor will torpedo any kind of relationship with the neighbor and could have pretty serious consequences and make your life miserable for years.

Seriously if the choice is between should I shut the window or should I put in a nuisance call with the police (again when there’s nothing they can do), shut the window.

I know @Lilacs4Me has already posted what she plans to do, but I still wanted to respond to your post to me. There are loads of people who smoke weed without a card in states where it's legal medically, and frankly, whether or not they are smoking legally doesn't change the fact that the smell has become a private nuisance by going into someone else's home. I didn't suggest to immediately call the police, but to talk to the neighbor first, and give him/his son a chance to remedy the issue. Of course, you should always try to remediate neighbor issues before getting police involved. If they refused to do anything and it was still an issue, only then would I go to the police, and I would have zero qualms about doing so. I wouldn't be worried about ruining a relationship with the neighbor as they would have already ruined it by refusing to take measures to keep their smoke from going into my child's bedroom window. If they cared so little about a genuine concern I had concerning their behavior affecting my home and my child, why would I want to be friendly with them??? Police can and do respond to nuisance calls all the time, generally just with warnings. If it becomes a pattern, then they may escalate to fines or other legal action, but frankly at that point, the neighbor would not only be causing a nuisance, but be repeatedly ignoring warnings by police.

From a legal standpoint, the Compassionate Use of Medical Cannabis Act (which outlines the rules for medical usage in Illinois) states: "This act does not permit any person to engage in, and does not prevent the imposition of any civil, criminal, or other penalties for engaging in, the following conduct: ... Using cannabis knowingly in close physical proximity to anyone under the age of 18." I would say smoking close enough that it's coming into a child's bedroom window would certainly fall into that.

Again, I'm all for trying to resolve the issue with the neighbors first, but if they refuse, there are other options that can be taken. A child shouldn't have to go to bed with the smell of weed or smoke in her bedroom.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Hee hee, dad’s a botanist...

I’m now picturing an entire family business inside the house.

 

[shoney]

Just curious. Would anyone’s opinions of what to do Change if it were cigar or cigarette smoke?

Doubt it is that close to contact high status so it is just the smell.

 

[starry_solo]

Just curious. Would anyone’s opinions of what to do Change if it were cigar or cigarette smoke?

Doubt it is that close to contact high status so it is just the smell.

Nope, smoke smell is smoke smell, regardless of how it actually smells.

 

[gotomu212]

I know @Lilacs4Me has already posted what she plans to do, but I still wanted to respond to your post to me. There are loads of people who smoke weed without a card in states where it's legal medically, and frankly, whether or not they are smoking legally doesn't change the fact that the smell has become a private nuisance by going into someone else's home. I didn't suggest to immediately call the police, but to talk to the neighbor first, and give him/his son a chance to remedy the issue. Of course, you should always try to remediate neighbor issues before getting police involved. If they refused to do anything and it was still an issue, only then would I go to the police, and I would have zero qualms about doing so. I wouldn't be worried about ruining a relationship with the neighbor as they would have already ruined it by refusing to take measures to keep their smoke from going into my child's bedroom window. If they cared so little about a genuine concern I had concerning their behavior affecting my home and my child, why would I want to be friendly with them??? Police can and do respond to nuisance calls all the time, generally just with warnings. If it becomes a pattern, then they may escalate to fines or other legal action, but frankly at that point, the neighbor would not only be causing a nuisance, but be repeatedly ignoring warnings by police.

From a legal standpoint, the Compassionate Use of Medical Cannabis Act (which outlines the rules for medical usage in Illinois) states: "This act does not permit any person to engage in, and does not prevent the imposition of any civil, criminal, or other penalties for engaging in, the following conduct: ... Using cannabis knowingly in close physical proximity to anyone under the age of 18." I would say smoking close enough that it's coming into a child's bedroom window would certainly fall into that.

Again, I'm all for trying to resolve the issue with the neighbors first, but if they refuse, there are other options that can be taken. A child shouldn't have to go to bed with the smell of weed or smoke in her bedroom.

I hear you, but the child doesn’t HAVE to go to bed smelling weed. The child wants to keep their window open. If I said I’m sorry it smells but there’s nowhere on my property to smoke where it wouldn’t smell (and a smell going 30 feet when you use it inside your own property is not the same as using it in close proximity to a minor- it’s just not. That would go for all kinds of adult activities that can’t happen around minors but can happen in your home adjacent to a home with minors) what’s the recourse? The guy never smokes on his property again? That’s just not reasonable to dictate what people can legally do on their property.

Like I said I’d be shocked if a regular user wouldn’t jump through the 2 or 3 very easy steps to get a card, but in my experience even if it was illegal once the police are called your relationship with a neighbor has just gone from annoying/irritating to nuclear. What is the solution if he is legal? The police say sorry can’t take action and you’ve now made an enemy that has the ability to make your home life miserable... it just lacks any foresight.

 

[sam_gordon]

Nope, smoke smell is smoke smell, regardless of how it actually smells.

So I should be able to go two streets away and ask the people there to not burn their brush because I can smell it? I mean smoke is smoke, right?

 

[starry_solo]

So I should be able to go two streets away and ask the people there to not burn their brush because I can smell it? I mean smoke is smoke, right?

If you can prove it's coming from them, sure, why not. However, I would think that burning brush is typically not authorized in many cities and those that allow it, typically allow it to occur in the daytime hours.

 

[LongLiveRafiki]

I hear you, but the child doesn’t HAVE to go to bed smelling weed. The child wants to keep their window open. If I said I’m sorry it smells but there’s nowhere on my property to smoke where it wouldn’t smell (and a smell going 30 feet when you use it inside your own property is not the same as using it in close proximity to a minor- it’s just not. That would go for all kinds of adult activities that can’t happen around minors but can happen in your home adjacent to a home with minors) what’s the recourse? The guy never smokes on his property again? That’s just not reasonable to dictate what people can legally do on their property.

Like I said I’d be shocked if a regular user wouldn’t jump through the 2 or 3 very easy steps to get a card, but in my experience even if it was illegal once the police are called your relationship with a neighbor has just gone from annoying/irritating to nuclear. What is the solution if he is legal? The police say sorry can’t take action and you’ve now made an enemy that has the ability to make your home life miserable... it just lacks any foresight.

People have a reasonable expectation to use all aspects of their home without interference from others' actions. Having to leave a window closed to prevent weed smoke from a neighbor from coming into the house infringes on that right. Just as people are telling OP to put a fan in the window or keep the window closed, the neighbor can also likely close their window/garage door or have a fan to keep the smoke from blowing towards her bedroom window. They can stop smoking outside right near her bedroom window and find another place on the property where it's not an issue, or go in the garage with fans and/or the doors and windows closed. The onus is on the one creating the nuisance to take reasonable measures to ensure they are not affecting others off their property by the actions they are doing on their property.

The police can absolutely take action. Even if it is legal for them to smoke it (if they have their medical card), it doesn't mean they can do it wherever they wish or that they are free from legal action just because they are using it for medical reasons. The quote I included in my last post shows that and there are loads of other things written into the law about where you can and can't smoke as well as laws outside of medical marijuana that deal with causing a nuisance to your neighbors.

As I indicated before, if I approached a neighbor with this particular concern and politely asked them to try to keep it from going in my child's window and they said no, they've broken any positive relationship I care to have with them. What are they (the neighbor) really going to do? Smoke more/even closer to the window? Create some other kind of nuisance? It's not like I'd have to sit there and let them continue to make my life inside my home miserable. If someone takes retaliatory measures after I have politely tried to resolve the issue with them and they refused, the police will get another call. People should not be afraid to call the cops on disruptive behavior because said people may retaliate.

So I should be able to go two streets away and ask the people there to not burn their brush because I can smell it? I mean smoke is smoke, right?

Many towns have ordinances that prohibit or limit burning of things like trash, brush, and leaves.

 

[ronandannette]

As a mother whose son smokes for medical reasons, I would not get mad at one of my neighbors telling me that his smoke is affecting their kids. I would ensure that he moves to another part of the yard that is away from their property. My DS would do it willingly.

Don't be judgy in your delivery, just say that you just realized that the smoke is wafting into your DD's room and ask if he could have his DS change his smoking venue. If they are good people, they will do that for you.

So many hard-nosed responses on this thread - I'd like to think a forum like this just allows people to express what they feel like doing, not what they'd actually do. In reality, people like you are very likely the norm and I'm glad. You're the neighbour I want to have, and the neighbour I want to be.

 

[pfp258]

If someone is smoking cigarettes and the second hand smoke reaches your home due to proximity would you be upset? What happens if they are cooking something very aromatic or bbqing food that stinks? Would you confront your neighbors? You cannot control what people do in their own homes. You can control your homes ventilation. Perhaps you just don’t like your neighbors? I don’t understand peoplesometimes

 

[pfp258]

People have a reasonable expectation to use all aspects of their home without interference from others' actions. Having to leave a window closed to prevent weed smoke from a neighbor from coming into the house infringes on that right. Just as people are telling OP to put a fan in the window or keep the window closed, the neighbor can also likely close their window/garage door or have a fan to keep the smoke from blowing towards her bedroom window. They can stop smoking outside right near her bedroom window and find another place on the property where it's not an issue, or go in the garage with fans and/or the doors and windows closed. The onus is on the one creating the nuisance to take reasonable measures to ensure they are not affecting others off their property by the actions they are doing on their property.

The police can absolutely take action. Even if it is legal for them to smoke it (if they have their medical card), it doesn't mean they can do it wherever they wish or that they are free from legal action just because they are using it for medical reasons. The quote I included in my last post shows that and there are loads of other things written into the law about where you can and can't smoke as well as laws outside of medical marijuana that deal with causing a nuisance to your neighbors.

As I indicated before, if I approached a neighbor with this particular concern and politely asked them to try to keep it from going in my child's window and they said no, they've broken any positive relationship I care to have with them. What are they (the neighbor) really going to do? Smoke more/even closer to the window? Create some other kind of nuisance? It's not like I'd have to sit there and let them continue to make my life inside my home miserable. If someone takes retaliatory measures after I have politely tried to resolve the issue with them and they refused, the police will get another call. People should not be afraid to call the cops on disruptive behavior because said people may retaliate.



Many towns have ordinances that prohibit or limit burning of things like trash, brush, and leaves.

Sorr

 

[rkstocke5609]

If the previous suggestions don’t work, I would place a strobe light on your property facing the garage door in question And turn it on whenever you smell the offensive skunks. That should do the trick and give them a hint to close the door.

 

[pfp258]

The onus is on the smoker to keep the smoke from wafting into the neighbours house, whether legal or illegal, pot or cigarette. I would politely let the neighbour know that smoke is getting into your child's room at night. They should be happy that they came to you first without escalating to calling law enforcement. Smoking Pot is legal here for recreation, it is not legal to smoke where it can enter any building other than you own. (and if you have kids in you home, you can't smoke in there either).

No actually smoking is legal in your own home. What are people thinking?