A difficult confession

[Rockbro]

Stick with it, you're so close.
I hope that my daughter never will be where you are. She sees that her dad must drink every night, and she knows how it affects him. He stopped for a while, and it was a good time for our family, but that was then, and we are back to his normal. I've tried my best to show our daughter her whole life that this doesn't have to be her normal. I had not been around anyone who wasn't able to do without wine nightly, so it caught me by surprise. Daughter is wiser, and will be on high alert, I hope, to not be in the same situation.
But she understands, it's not anything to do with being a good or bad person.
He's a good person.
And I believe you are, too.
But life's better without the drinking, for you and those around you. And no matter what may be going on with your marriage, there ARE people around you. Don't let her issues be an excuse to baskslide.
Stick with it.
Well, without it.
Nothing wrong with a few extra dollars in the pocket and giving your body and brain what they really need instead of what they don't.
And if what they need is Disney, we all understand that here!
I hope you had a great day. Editing b/c that line sounds stupid under the circumstances. What I meant to say was I hope you have had the best possible day, given the circumstances.

No reply is stupid. Thank you.

 

[Rockbro]

Stick with it, you're so close.
I hope that my daughter never will be where you are. She sees that her dad must drink every night, and she knows how it affects him. He stopped for a while, and it was a good time for our family, but that was then, and we are back to his normal. I've tried my best to show our daughter her whole life that this doesn't have to be her normal. I had not been around anyone who wasn't able to do without wine nightly, so it caught me by surprise. Daughter is wiser, and will be on high alert, I hope, to not be in the same situation.
But she understands, it's not anything to do with being a good or bad person.
He's a good person.
And I believe you are, too.
But life's better without the drinking, for you and those around you. And no matter what may be going on with your marriage, there ARE people around you. Don't let her issues be an excuse to baskslide.
Stick with it.
Well, without it.
Nothing wrong with a few extra dollars in the pocket and giving your body and brain what they really need instead of what they don't.
And if what they need is Disney, we all understand that here!
I hope you had a great day. Editing b/c that line sounds stupid under the circumstances. What I meant to say was I hope you have had the best possible day, given the circumstances.

No reply is stupid.

 

[Rockbro]

SO, uh, yeah.

I relapsed. Wife leaving, career...

Damn it (not sure if allowed), I'm just tired. I hate this damn disease. Pick myself up. One hour. Sorry to have let you all down (especially me)

 

[Rockbro]

I'm not sure if I'm allowed, since I'm new but I'm going to try...

 

[Rebma512]

SO, uh, yeah.

I relapsed. Wife leaving, career...

Damn it (not sure if allowed), I'm just tired. I hate this damn disease. Pick myself up. One hour. Sorry to have let you all down (especially me)

Thanks for sharing, hang tough, tomorrow is a new day, we will see you then!

 

[mgarbowski]

Today is another chance to start.

 

[Morieris]

Setbacks happen. It's important that you don't beat yourself up to the point where you stop trying to improve, and yes, tomorrow is a new day!

 

[Rebma512]

I'm not sure if I'm allowed, since I'm new but I'm going to try...

Hello friend, how are you today?

 

[Rockbro]

Hello friend, how are you today?

My wife decided to come home (tentatively). That makes everything better.

It gives me hope.

I'm busy watching the "Brady Brunch" on WMOR and wishing I could eat. I've been pushing fluids to pull myself up by my bootstraps. I'm not letting a liquid kill me. I'd rather it be a disgusting fried food that that takes me out .

...preferably Liberty Tree Tavern.

And I should say this... I'm not a big guy. I'm 6 foot 1 and 180 pounds. So it would take FOREVER for food to kill me

 

[Rebma512]

Hap

My wife decided to come home (tentatively). That makes everything better.

It gives me hope.

I'm busy watching the "Brady Brunch" on WMOR and wishing I could eat. I've been pushing fluids to pull myself up by my bootstraps. I'm not letting a liquid kill me. I'd rather it be a disgusting fried food that that takes me out .

...preferably Liberty Tree Tavern.

And I should say this... I'm not a big guy. I'm 6 foot 1 and 180 pounds. So it would take FOREVER for food to kill me

happy to hear from you

 

[DL1WDW2]

Have you ever talked with your wife about her feelings being married to somebody that drinks excessively? What has that been for her.
First ? From my personal experiences as I mentioned early in this thread... I started dating at 16 years... we were best friends he even taught me how to drive a blue 60s Ford Falcon... and then he left for college and joined a fraternity. He was no longer the same person. I never drank because Beer looked & smelled bad. But the unspoken problems that brought alcohol such as smell and taste of a kiss ruined our marriage eventually. Driving under influence citations Twice , yes 2 , miracle he did not harm property or life’s... but everytime we saved up money for down payment ... oops had to hire a lawyer... This was back when you didn’t worry that auto insurance would increase or you might lose your job or spend time in jail...
So try to grow up and think about how this affects your life and your family and the past and the future.
Please

This sounds harsh and terrible but when he lost that battle after emergency heart attack ... I could not cry. I was very angry and it has taken 2 years to start to miss him .

 

[Carol_]

I'm writing this because I need an outlet. I can only put so much on my family, but I can't sit on everything.

My wife turned 34 today. I had a whole day planned; I was going to take her to MK, then go to Morimoto for dinner, The Ganachery for her dessert (I don't eat stuff like that) and then a $100 shopping spree (yeah, I know, at Disney Springs that's about a bag of jelly beans). She left to go to another place 2,000 miles away (I don't want to give up too much information) and told me she'd be back early afternoon today for her birthday dinner and then leave again. I just found out that she won't be back at all today, she cancelled her flight.

I know this all sounds convoluted and like a made-up story, but it is not. I just need to write because it is cathartic and helps me not to drive myself crazy .

There won't be any MK today. I can't associate this with anything Disney. It will ruin it for me.

Thanks for reading. Again, I swear this is all true and I am not a troll.

EDIT: I put 14 years into this woman. In May 2020, celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary. Why do bad things happen to bad people? I have a dark sense of humor and way of dealing with things. The last year hasn't been so great... again, thanks for reading.

Now, you know that great things happen to bad people all the time. There are too many examples.
Keep your chin up. Soon you’ll have a multimillion dollar estate, oodles of well dressed friends, and private hippos.

 

[married2mm]

Wow op; I’ve just read through this whole thread.
I actually clicked on it as I thought the confession maybe you’ve never been to a Disney park!
I was not prepared for the alcoholic confession, nor the outpouring of love & support .

We all have issues. Some of our demons are bigger than others.
One of the worst ways to live is to be unable to recognise them.
You have done this.
That is an achievement.

Every single second of every day we make choices.
The vast majority we pay no attention to whatsoever.
Those which truly deserve our attention require us to be present and mindful.
This is often easier said than done.

No matter which path we follow, there will always be curveballs,upsets, relapses.
However; through these difficult times, there are also learnings to be made.

You know if you continue on the wrong path there will be consequences.
Medical assistance, family, therapy, AA, online support are all there for you.

Life is tough. It’s really not all pixie dust and magic. Its not a smooth ride. It’s goes up & down.

Alcoholism as a previous poster stated is a disease. It requires treatment.
You need treatment.
You have not let anyone down.
You are human; we make mistakes.

I sincerely hope this doesn’t sound too preachy.
I’m thinking of you.
Sending virtual support with your lifelong struggle.
Focus on the present & the not too distant future.
We can’t change the past.
W can help shape tomorrow.

 

[Rebma512]

Hey Rockbro, just checking in, how are you?!

 

[Rockbro]

Hey Rockbro, just checking in, how are you?!

Every day gets a little easier.

 

[Rebma512]

Every day gets a little easier.

Glad to hear my friend

 

[Canadi-Lynne]

Thank you all, for your kind words. Someday, this thing is going to beat me, but if I try, I can put it off as long as possible. I'm 42, been drinking for 31.5 years.

Advice: If you're a new drinker, feeling as if you "need" it, stop now. I'm not perfect, but I do have some wisdom. There's what is called a "tipping point." It's when you are beyond repair. But not everyone has to get to it. I don't think I'm there yet. I still have ambition and pride.

I'm no-one to give advice on this, but if I can save one life, this is worth it. I spent my life saving lives... this is the most important.

You can do this! You have taken the first step. The key is, like others have said, professional guidance to help with withdrawals and expectations. The next is remembering to take it day by day, minute by minute, rather than an insurmountable journey. You will always feel temptation but with the right tools in your toolbox you can move through it. I'm glad that Disney and this board gives you another focus. I know when I get low about all that is happening in the world Disney gives me the boost I need as well! Good luck to you!

 

[variclay]

you can do this!! sending pixie dust!

 

[Rebma512]

Rockbro...thinking of you, hope you are well

 

[LovingPooh]

Prayers going out for you.