Jackie and Chris's Wishes Wedding 1/6/12: SBP/Attic/SCP 5/11 Final Post- PJ Finished

[Designer Rose]

Jackie, first of all, let me say again how sorry I am for your loss. I simply can't imagine what you're going through.
I think you should go through with your planning journal, because I don't think you should feel bad about feeling happy about the fact that you got married. I don't think your dad would want you to do that. There is no rule that says that you can be happy while also grieving. I know because I had to learn that lesson too. So, embrace your dad's memory, but also embrace the happiness that comes with marriage. Again, I'm sorry Jackie, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

 

[belleinpink]

Jackie, I just want to tell you again how incredibly sorry I am. As for continuing with your pj/tr I say do whatever feels best for you. In my opinion I think it might help you to relive the happiness of your wedding and honeymoon. However you may feel otherwise. Whatever you choose we will support you.

Again I am so incredibly sorry you have to go through this so soon after your wedding and the holidays. I'll be thinking of you

 

[DisneyShamrock]

Jackie, first of all, let me say again how sorry I am for your loss. I simply can't imagine what you're going through.
I think you should go through with your planning journal, because I don't think you should feel bad about feeling happy about the fact that you got married. I don't think your dad would want you to do that. There is no rule that says that you can be happy while also grieving. I know because I had to learn that lesson too. So, embrace your dad's memory, but also embrace the happiness that comes with marriage. Again, I'm sorry Jackie, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

I completely agree. I think going through with your trip report will help keep the memories alive, and that is what your dad would have wanted. We'll be here if you decide to wait a bit to let things settle.

I'll be keeping you in my prayers, hun.

 

[MrRomance]

Jackie, I think the decision about your trip report is one only you can make, but I agree with the PP's that it may help carry you through your grief and relive the happy memories you had with your dad.

I'm so incredibly sorry that you have to endure this hurt at what should be a very happy time. I don't know your dad, but I'm sure he wouldn't want his passing to impact on your happiness at your new marriage. I'm sure he was proud to be by your side for your wedding and that whatever differences you may have had in the past were behind you.

Do what feels right to you, but I know when my dad died Christmas 2008 and I was away, it helped me to keep busy and focus on the positive things in my life.

 

[PrincessElla]

Jackie,

Again I'm so sorry for your loss. I think your dad would want you to be happy. Its okay to grieve but to still smile. I lost my dad 14 yrs ago, just days after coming home from an amazing vacation, so in ways I can relate. Don't ever forget there is no proper way to grieve. When your ready we are all here.

I love that picture of your dad walking you down the aisle. Its a precious picture.

 

[mebbradley]

Jackie, first of all, let me say again how sorry I am for your loss. I simply can't imagine what you're going through.
I think you should go through with your planning journal, because I don't think you should feel bad about feeling happy about the fact that you got married. I don't think your dad would want you to do that. There is no rule that says that you can be happy while also grieving. I know because I had to learn that lesson too. So, embrace your dad's memory, but also embrace the happiness that comes with marriage. Again, I'm sorry Jackie, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Jackie, Words cannot express how much we feel for you. We may not be able to comfort you in person but we are here.

I feel that in time, once everything settles a little bit, you should share your memories with us. It may help you and also help you to know that your dad was very happy for you to get married. We see that in his face as he was walking you down the asile.

We're here for you no matter what you choose to do!

We love you and we'll be here to talk to you no matter when.

 

[librarygeek]

Jackie, I am so, so sorry for your loss. I wish there was something I could do for you.

As for the trip report, I agree that ultimately it is up to you. However, the other girls are absolutely right in saying that you shouldn't feel guilty for still being happy while grieving. From what you've told us about your dad it sounds like he would want you to remember the happy memories. If you need to step away for awhile do that, and if you need the support/distraction/happiness of the wedding memories to cheer you up then post your TR.

Good luck Jackie, we are all here for you.

 

[Mindyjoy]

Jackie sweetie, I'm so so sorry for your loss. There's not much I can type that doesn't seem trivial. Just know we are all here for you. As for your TR, do what's right for you and take as much time as you need to grieve. But, as others have said, I'm sure your Dad would want for you to continue with your life as normal, to be happy and remember the good times of your wedding. Plus you have a legion of followers who are so anxious to read all about your wonderful wedding day. So I think you should start whenever your ready.

 

[yourgypsy]

Jackie, my heart is still breaking for you. If you don't want to post about it right away, wait. Don't feel that you have to do it for us. Do it when it feels right for you. Take some time for yourself. But remember that we're all here if you need to talk, vent, anything.

 

[Jilian]

Jackie, I'm so sorry for the loss of your dad but happy that you have some wonderful recent pictures and memories of him to keep in your heart forever. As a parent, if anything happened to me I would absolutely want my children to go on living their lives and to do what makes them happiest. So if updating your PJ and talking about your beautiful wedding makes you happy, then please do it! If it becomes to painful or hard on you we all completely understand if you need to take time away. But we're all here if you need a shoulder to lean on. We're all SILs after all!

 

[princess_ariel_85]

Jackie, first of all, let me say again how sorry I am for your loss. I simply can't imagine what you're going through.
I think you should go through with your planning journal, because I don't think you should feel bad about feeling happy about the fact that you got married. I don't think your dad would want you to do that. There is no rule that says that you can be happy while also grieving. I know because I had to learn that lesson too. So, embrace your dad's memory, but also embrace the happiness that comes with marriage. Again, I'm sorry Jackie, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

I agree.

I am truly sorry for your loss Jackie. You should do your trip report when your are ready and in your own time. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

xx

 

[One_Song]

Jackie,
I'm glad to hear your wedding and honeymoon were wonderful. As for now, I agree with others that you should do what feels right to you. If writing the TR brings you some happiness, you should write it. If it makes you sad, stop. Maybe you could start by writing just for you-- not to post, but just to keep. You are obviously someone that connects to writing and literature, and maybe that outlet could be beneficial for you. Sometimes I think our writing helps us better understand ourselves. Then, when you feel ready-- if you do-- you can post it here. Or if you're not ready to write about the wedding, but you need to write about your day-to-day, we're here to listen to that, too.

I will be praying for God to give you peace.

 

[disneyido2015]

Hello Jackie,

Please acept my heartfelt condolences on the loss of your father. I concur with all of the other posters that you should not feel guilty for your happiness, but I totally understand your hesitation in wanting to carriying on with your story. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers during this time.

 

[MrsDuck]

So happy for you and Chris!!

Jackie, my heart breaks for the loss of your father. I wish I had helpful words but please know that I am sending my love, prayers, and pixiedust your way.

Selfishly, I'd love to see your TR BUT, you need to do what's best for you right now-- maybe the TR will give you an outlet or perhaps it will be a good distraction for later. We support you and love you no matter what.

The picture of you and your dad makes me tear up- I can't imagine how hard this is for you. My "pookie" (daddy) is my world and I don't even want to imagine the heartbreak you are feeling.

Again, I wish I had some helpful words for you.

Sending major love and s

 

[LindaBabe]

Jackie, I am so so sorry for your loss. A dad is such a big influence on his daughter's life and leaves just as big a hole in it when he transitions to the next life. I was much older than you when I lost my dad - but still . . . Your father must have been just thrilled that he got to walk you down the aisle! He must have been so pleased when received your text of love. His angel must be thankful you have a nice young man to lean on in this difficult time. You will miss your dad so much - but he will live forever in your heart.

I second those who say Write for yourself - let the tears flow and grieve as long as it takes. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

 

[tric8783]

Oh Jackie, I am so sorry to hear this. Absolutely if it makes you feel better or even takes your mind away for a few minutes, write it out. If it gets to be too much, put it to the side and come back to it later. I'm sure all of your memories are so deep you won't lose them if you don't write about them right away.
We are all here for you, and we'll be listening when you're ready

 

[LittleKittyMarie]

Jackie, I am so sorry for your loss. I also agree with many of the other posts--do what feels right to you. I don't think you should feel guilty for your happiness about your wedding and marriage, but I completely understand how such conflicting emotions can be difficult to reconcile. Don't push yourself to write the TR, or even to not write the TR, if that's what you truly want to do.

Once again, my most heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

 

[BethieTink]

Jackie,

As I wrote to you on facebook, I wish I could come up with something healing and profound to make it hurt even just a bit less, but I have never found those magic words.

In regard to feeling happiness over your honeymoon, you had no idea what was going to happen while you were on your last day or way home. Please don't torture yourself over it. I am sure while you were away, your Daddy wanted you to have the time of your life. Not to feel badly for having it.

As for the trip report, I know I would love to read it, but you have to do what is right for you (when too!). I think it might help to remember your dad was so happy for you. That is the lasting memory you should keep and reliving those days might help. He knows that you were over-the-moon happy and that Chris will always be there to love and take care of you. If you decide to tell us all about it, it is also a way to give us a little glimpse of your special relationship.

I understand the one more I love you so much. I have wished almost every day for the last 21 years that I could have one more conversation with my mom. On days where I really feel that need, I do have it. I tell her all the time that I love her and miss her. There is nothing wrong with that. I am not a religious person, at all, but I need to believe that she can hear me and she knows. So my advice is, say it out loud as often as you need to. I am sure your Dad won't mind hearing it.

Sorry this got so long, but I hope it helped a bit. You and Chris are in my thoughts and if you need anything please let me know. Someday, I hope to give you this in person, but for now will have to do.

 

[ericamcl]

Words can not express how sorry I am to hear of your loss.
I think you should do what is in your heart-you may have days where you want to write about your beautiful wedding, and remember your daddy as he walked you down the aisle - and there will also be days where you don't want to think about it.

i agree with the PPs - do what you want, when you're ready.
take time to grieve and know that we are all thinking about you!

 

[Icecoldpenguin]

Jackie,

I simply do not have any good words that someone else has not already said. I wanted to write though and tell you that my heart breaks for you. You are definitely in my prayers and in greg's. I know what it is like to lose someone and you have to continue with your life even though it is hard.

You can grieve and be happy about the fact that you just got married. Do not feel guilty your dad wanted you to get married and perhaps this is the way it is supposed to be. He passed you off to chris who will now be there to take care of you. I don't know if any of this will help.

I want to hear about your trip so I want you to write your TR but ultimately you need to do that when you want to. I can say though that you seem to like to vent your feelings on your PJ and I can tell you that we are a great audience for you. We all love you and consider you our SIL.

I love you to pieces,

Teresa