I’m late to the thread and I hadn’t heard about the realtor story before, but it reminded me of something I want to comment on.
When I was in the hospital in labor, my overnight nurse was a Nigerian woman. She asked me what I planned to name my son when he was born and when I answered, she told me it was a beautiful name. I kind of laughed and asked how often she found herself telling patients she liked the name while secretly thinking it was hideous. She replied that all names are beautiful simply by virtue of having been chosen by the parents to bestow upon their child. That parents choose a name that is special to them, to give to the most important person in their life, and that alone makes the name beautiful. She didn’t believe there were any bad or ugly names because they were all chosen in love. (It was right around this point that I was feeling like a huge jackhole.) We then discussed how names are traditionally chosen in Nigeria, the sentiment behind them, their cultural importance, the honor of being able to choose a name for your child, the honor of carrying a name throughout your life that was lovingly chosen just for you, etc. (Meanwhile, my kids’ names were chosen just because I liked them.
)
The Ellen story about the realtor, Titi, is awful. It’s made worse, in my mind, reading that the woman is Nigerian and knowing that to her a name is probably not just a name. She probably views her name as something deeply personal and meaningful that serves as a connection to and reflection on her mother who picked it for her.